Penguins of Madagascar alternate version
by penguin adventures
Summary: When the world needs saving it will take the most elite team on earth Skipper, Kowalski, Rico, Private...And Elsa? Team Penguin must join forces with undercover organization The North Wind to stop the villainous Dr. Octavius Brine (A.K.A Dave the Octopus) from destroying the world as we know it. Movie AU for Penguins of Madagascar.
1. Chapter One: Antartica origins

Some Years Ago

(Narrator POV)

Antarctica…an inhospitable wasteland…but even here on the Earth's frozen bottom we find life. And not just any life…Penguins! Joyous, frolicking, waddling, cute and cuddly life. Look at them… Tumbling onto their chubby bum-bums. Who could take these frisky little snow clowns…

(Baby Skipper's POV)

"Seriously?" I said, "Does anyone even know where we're marching to?" "Who cares?" "I question nothing!" "Me, Too!" "Me, Too!" "Well fine," I said, "We'll just fly to the front of the line and see for ourselves." "Kowalski! Rico! Elsa! Engage aerial surveillance." The four of us began to flap our flippers as quickly as possible. "Here we go! Doing it! Come on!" "Skipper," Kowalski said, "we appear to be flightless." "Oh" I replied, "Well what's the point of these?"

Rico's face brighten as he got an idea and slapped my flipper with his flipper. "Hi-Yeah!" Rico exclaimed. "Whoa I like it," I said, "Hey; this could be our thing…" "What should we call it?" "The High one?" Elsa said. "Yes…Let's call it the High one," I replied. An egg rolled out of nowhere and knocked us all down. I watched as the egg rolled away "Hey did anybody see that? That's an Egg!" "Is someone gonna go get it?" I said. "We can't do that," an adult penguin replied. "Why not?" Elsa asked. "Well it's a dangerous world out there, and we're just Penguins. You know nothing but cute and cuddly." "Yeah! Why do you think there are always documentary crews filming us?"

A documentary crew was in fact filming us at that exact moment. How do you get used to that? "Well sorry kid," an adult male penguin said, "We lose a few eggs every year. It's just nature." "Oh, right. Nature," I said, "Well I guess that make sense… but something deep down in my gut tells me that it makes no sense at all." "You know what? I reject Nature!" All the adult Penguins gasped then looked away and kept on marching to who knows where. "Who's with me?" I asked before running screaming in the other direction. I then slid after the egg not looking to see if the other three followed. The Egg started to roll towards a cliff and when I realized this I tried to slide to a stop. I struggled to stop as I slid towards the edge knocking the egg off in the process.

In mere seconds I was in freefall with the egg but something stopped my fall. Well actually three somethings. Rico laughed and my three fellow penguins pulled me up. We could only watch helplessly as the egg fell rolled on spiky ice and rolled up into a giant snowball. The Giant snowball landed on a shipwreck and cracked open allowing the eye to roll safety on the deck. "The old Ship," Kowalski said. "No one's ever returned from there alive," Elsa said with a gasp. A seagull flew in and landed on an oil barrel on the deck. "Relax Kowalski and Elsa. There's a bird down there now," I said.

"Look, he's fine." I said right before a leopard seal appeared and ate the gull. "Leopard seals. Nature's snakes." "Aren't snakes nature's snakes?" Elsa asked. "How should I knew, I live on the flipping frozen tundra!" I said. "Language!" Elsa said. "Sorry," I replied. The leopard seals started barking…don't let their cute bark fool you leopard seals are an apex predator. "They're going for the egg!" Elsa shouted. "Give me a way down there, ASAP!" Kowalski turns to me and said, "All one would have to do is collect 300 feet of kelp…" while Kowalski talked a man with a microphone looked into a camera and said, "Tiny and helpless, the baby penguins are frozen with fear. They know if they fall from this cliff they will surely die." Not helping! "Gunter, give them a shove," he told the soundman. "…harnessing the jellyfish we've trained to obey simple voice commands," Kowalski said right as the boom mic appeared by us.

The mic slammed into the four of us and sent us off the cliff. "Now that's more like it," I said. And just like the egg we eventually ended up in a snowball and onto the old ship. Rico slid towards the egg as the leopard seals approached. He grabbed the egg as the seals got closer. "That-a-boy, Rico!" I shouted. "Don't let them have it!" Elsa shouted. Rico swallowed the egg momentary confusing the seals. "Okay! I guess that works," I said. One of the seals growled and snapped at me but Kowalski and I managed to jump out of the way.

The seals jumped on top of each other but we were to fast. "Get to high ground!" Kowalski shouted. The seals bumped into oil barrels as we ran away. I vaulted Rico from the lower part of the deck to the higher part of the deck. Rico grabbed me by the flipper and pulled me up right before a seal slammed into the wall. The four of us hopped onto a mounted harpoon and climbed to the top a brave seal following us up the gun. "I'd recommend firing it now!" Kowalski said. "Nope. Hold on." "Are you crazy!" Elsa shouted. "We really should fire it!" Kowalski shouted. "Not till we see the white of its eyes!" I replied. "They're mostly pupil," Kowalski said, "Very little white! Almost none!" "Just fire it already!" Elsa said. "They gotta have a little bit of white, right?" I said receiving an eye roll from Elsa. "None Whatsoever!" Elsa shouted. "What if they look really far to the left?" Elsa have had enough and grabbed the rope from me and fired the harpoon. "Fire in the hole!" I shouted.

The harpoon crashed into the smoke stack sending the four of us flying. We landed safely on a nearby iceberg on the ocean. Elsa, Kowalski and I landed perfectly on top of Rico I the egg landed on my feet. The smoke stack landed on the deck of the ship and the ship exploded than sank. "Kowalski, analysis?" I asked. "We are really awesome at this," Kowalski said as the smoke stack fell behind us. "Boys…and girl, we did it! Mission accomplished." "Hey, we could do our thing! High one!" The four of us did the high one even the egg got come action. We stopped when we heard a cracking we turned. "Oh!" I said, "My bad!" "Uh-oh," Elsa said. "Look," I said, "it's the miracle of birth!" "A moment of extraordinary beauty," Kowalski said. The egg literally exploded sending fluid and York at all over us. "Oh, that's disgusting," Elsa said. "I think I have amniotic sac in m mouth!" I said.

The baby penguin said, "Hello! Are you my family?" We look behind us to see that there was no way we were going back to Antarctica. We looked at each other and nodded in agreement. We turned back to the baby penguin and I opened my mouth to speak. Kowalski stepped in front of me and said, "You don't have a family, and we're all going to die! Sorry." "What?" the baby penguin asked. I elbowed Kowalski while Elsa gave him an icy stare. "What? I thought that was what we were all nodding about," he replied. I slapped him lightly and said, "No one's gonna die!"

"Know what you've got, Kid?" I said, "You've got us. We've got each other. If that ain't a family, I don't know what is." "Nice save there Skipper," Elsa said. "Thank you," I said. I saluted the young penguin and he saluted back. "So adorable," I said before turning to Kowalski, "Kowalski! What's our trajectory?" The baby penguin turned as Kowalski said, "95% certain we're still doomed." "And the, uh, other 5%?" "Adventure and glory like no penguins have ever seen before!" he replied. "I'll take that action," I said. "But where are we going?" "The future," I said, "The Glorious future."

(End of chapter one)


	2. Chapter Two: The Glorious Future

**(dramatic music starts playing)**

 **20th Century Fox Presents**

He's a creature from deep down in the ocean  
He's been dreaming while we sleep, of a deadly potion  
That will have all his enemies falling at his feet  
And put his name on every neon sign  
From People's Square to 42nd Street

 **A DreamWorks Animation production**

(chorus)

He is Dave! He's riding the wave of evil!  
You can run, you can hide  
He'll smell the fear in your eyes  
He is Dave! He's coming to hunt down our friends  
Dressed in black and white, better run for your life  
He's turning the day into night

 **Tom McGrath**

 **Chris Miller**

 **Christopher Knights**

 **Conrad Vernon**

 **Idina Menzel**

 **Ken Jeong**

 **Peter Stormare**

 **Annet Mahemoru**

 **with**

 **John Malkovich**

 **And**

 **Benedict Cumberbatch**

He's out of his mind, demented with jealousy  
In his eyes I see vengeance and lunacy  
He can instill more terror than 10,000 Goliaths can  
He's a tyrant, a crazy animal mega-maniac Leviathathan  
With a terrifying master plan

(chorus)

You can run, you can hide  
He'll smell the fear in your eyes  
He is Dave! He's coming to hunt down our friends  
Dressed in black and white, better run for their lives  
He's turning the day into night  
He is Dave!

Dave's Evil laugh

 **DreamWork's**

 **Penguins of Madagascar**

(Song ends smoothly)

United States of America

The glorious future

(Skipper's POV)

Afro circus (I like to move it) was playing loudly in the background. "Argh, that song!" Elsa said. "I swear," I said, "it's gonna make me lose my salmon!" "Don't swear," Elsa muttered. "Singing getting louder, Skipper," Kowalski said. "Then move faster!" I shouted, "And somebody get that wig off Private!" Private was dancing around when Rico took the rainbow wig off him. "Kowalski, status report!" "I'm really getting tired of this song," he said holding up a rolled up hang glider with help from Rico, Private, and Elsa. "Well the best part of owning a circus…" I said as we all climbed into the cannon, "you can transport a cannon over state lines." The cannon fired sending us out of the tent.

The hang glider leveled off and we rode the wind to our next destination. "Ten years ago, on this very day, a tiny egg hatched…and our world got a little bit cuter," I said grabbing Private by the cheak. "So, tonight, private, we celebrate your birthday…" "By infiltarating the United States gold depository," Elsa said dramatically, "at Fort Knox!" "Splendid!" Kowalski said. "What?" Private said but we didn't pay attention. "Elsa I was going to say that," I shouted. "I do it more dramatically," she replied.

"There she is, boys!" I said. "Excuse me?" Elsa said. "Okay there she is guys!" "Much better," she replied. "Anyways…The object of our unholy desires the butter on our biscuit the royal flush…" "Skipper?" Private said ruining the moment. "Private, what's our rule about interrupting analogies?" "Sorry. Please continue." I sighed and said, "The moment's gone. Private ruined it." "Sir, we're approaching our target," Kowalski said right before we hit our target.

It took a moment to regain our bearings before Private said, "But, Skipper, I really don't…" "Are you questioning my leadership, Private?" "Men," Elsa muttered. "No, sir!" "Too bad," I replied as we hurried to the lip of the roof. "Because I respect a soldier with some moxie," I said. Kowalski, Rico, and Elsa nodded. "Really?" Private said, "Then I really think we should…" "Whoa, whoa!" I said, "Dial back the moxie, sass-mouth!" "eh-hmm," Elsa said. "Oh, look at you. Still so adorable," I said rubbing Private's head. Down below a guard opened the doors of the fort and walked out.

"Fire in the hole," I whispered and sent a sleep bomb disguised as a child's toy to the ground. The guards looked down at it in confusion. "Eight o'clock," the bomb said, "Night-night time!" Knock out gas was released from the bomb and all the guards fell to the ground asleep. I stepped in front of everyone and Elsa, Rico, and Kowalski entered the building. Private stopped by one of the guard's hat, what does he think this is Christmas? "Private, come on!" I shouted getting him into the building sneaking in behind him. There was a black and white cross-walk allowing us to roll in undetected by a guard.

We slid in front of the gold vault door. A man on speaker said, "Please enter pass code." "Kowalski, you're up," I said. Rico, Private, and Elsa got into an attack stack and Kowalski got on top. "Please enter pass code." "Rico!" Kowalski said, "Sonic incursion device." Rico passed Kowalski a portable tape player and it started to play bluegrass music. "Oh, come on. You're kidding, right?" I said. "Kentucky, Skipper. They do love their Flatt and Scruggs." "Y'all come in now, you hear?" the speaker said, "Have yourself an ice tea." The vault door unlocked and the heavy door opened revealing the gold inside. "Private, if you could have anything you wanted in the whole world what would it be?" I said. "Well, gee. Skipper." "This is going to be good," Elsa said. "I think to be a meaningful and valued member of this team. "Well, we got you something else," I said.

We rushed Private to a break room at the other end of the vault (who built this place?) and placed him in front of a vending machine. "A vending machine?" he asked. "Not just any vending machine, Private," I replied, "The last remaining home in America's nanny state for those succulent, but chemically hazardous bits of puffed heaven called…" "Cheezy Dibbles!" Private exclaimed. "We broke into a gold depository for snacks," Elsa muttered. I ignored her, handed Private a coin and said, "Happy ding-dong birthday, you little scamp." "Thank you!" Private said and kissed me on the cheak, then Kowalski, then Elsa, and finally went to do the same to Rico. Rico grabbed Private and kissed him on the beak as Private struggled. "You mess with the bull, you're gonna get the horns, Private," I advised him when Rico released him, "Now hit that machine and get your present!"

Private ran to the vending machine and put his coin into the machine. He then jumps up and enters the number of a bag of Cheesy Dibbles. While Private waited I said, "We just broke into the most secure facility in North America." "And we didn't get any gold," Elsa said. "We broke into the New York Federal Reserve remember," I said, "Plus we're sitting on a boatload of cash from the Circus!" "Sorry," She replied, "continue." "You know what that means?" "We're wanted criminals who'll be on the lam the rest of our lives always feeling the hot breath of Johnny Law on our necks?" "No! It means, as elite units go," I said, "We're the elitist of the elite, top shelf in the bureau, the Penultimate, plus one." While I was saying this a tentacle came out of the Dibble machine and grabbed Private.

"Where'd Private go?" I asked. "Oh, there he is," Kowalski said, "Inside the vending machine. "D-3," Elsa added. "Oh, Private. How much is he?" I asked. "He's $3.50, sir." "That's outrageous. Even for Private." "Skipper just buy him!" Elsa said, "That was not how I intended that sentence." Another Tentacle appeared and grabbed Rico. "Sir! The machine is alive," Kowalski said before he got grabbed by a Tentacle. "I knew it was too good to be true," Elsa said while she got grabbed by a third tentacle. The Tentacle pulled Elsa into the machine before I could do anything, "I don't think I like your attitude, Vending machine," I said, "Or your prices!" I got into battle stance and said, "Release them!" Before I could do anything a tentacle grabbed me and violently pulled me into the machine. The tentacle put me in F-5 right as an armed guard walked in. "What the…?" he said. "A-ha!" the guard said his gun facing the wrong way as the vending machine stood up on all it's tentacles.

The Vending machine hit the guard in the face and broke thru the wall alerting the other guards. Guards who were unable to stop the machine's escape allowing it to break thru the roof. It then jumped off the roof and was caught by an awaiting helicopter and carried into the Kentucky night…


	3. Chapter Three: DAVE

Venice, Italy

(Skipper's POV)

The helicopter flew the vending machine with us in it over the canals and walkways of Venice (Playing dramatic music on its speakers). The helicopter flew towards a sub and positions itself over the conning tower. It hovered over the Sub long enough to drop us off inside the belly of the beast. The Vending machine lowered and the helicopter spinned it before lifting it up leaving behind a cage with us inside. We heard the helicopter leave the area as our eyes adjusted to the dark interior.

I look around suspiciously at our surroundings and ate a Dibble. "Kowalski, Analysis!" I commanded. "All evidence indicates," Kowalski's stomach rumbled, "I ate too many Cheezy Dibbles." "How can you even stand that stuff," Elsa exclaimed. "Says the Penguin who eats lutefish," Kowalski muttered. "We're behind enemy lines and incredibly thirsty," I said, "Rico, bust us out of this delicious prison!" Rico smiled and hacked up a paper clip and broke us from the cage. "Nice Work, Rico!" I said. "Disgusting but helpful," Elsa replied. Rico, Kowalski, Elsa, and I got into the trademark Penguin battle stance, "You are a meaningful and valued member of this team," I said.

Private sadly put his head down then grabbed the paper clip and swallowed it. When he attempted to regurgitate it up he started to gag. "Private, quit lollygagging," I said, "and regular gagging!" As we approached a platform in tight formation I said, "Dark and ominous two of my least favorite traits in a room." "Oh, Look! A button!" Private exclaimed. "Huh? Private, don't" I said. "This is going well," Elsa replied. Private pushed the button anyway and the platform went down a level.

The Platform stopped and we all breathed a sigh of relief. "Now, what have I told you about…?" I said. Private flipped the cover on another button and pushed it, "Sorry, What?" A big ominous laser appeared from the shadows and pointed its beam at us. "It looks like some sort of giant laser sent to kill us all, sir," Kowalski said. My eyes widened and stepped out of the line of fire. It was then Kowalski's turn to widen his eyes. "Ooh! Another one!" "No!" we all shouted in unison. Right before Private pushes the button the four of us stop him with our flippers.

As soon as we did that some sticky goop fell from above, "What the…" I said. A man's voice came from above, "Naughty, naughty!" The man was dressed like a scientist and was literally walking upside down on the ceiling. "Huh?" I said. "Pretty birds belong in their cages." We all moved away from the laser's controls to look at the strange newcomer. The man then fell from the ceiling and landed in a heap on the ground goop flying everywhere. We all gasped in shock. His hand pulled him up and he turned his head 360 degrees to be looking at us. "Ew!" we all yelled. "Now that is just hurtful," he said, "And I was so happy to see you again."

"Wait…I'm confused," Elsa said, "Again." He returned to his legs and seemed to grow but was having a hard time getting his bearings. "Skipper, Kowalski, Elsa, Rico…" he said. Once he got to his full height he leaned in closer to Private, "And Sweet little Private." "Boop," he said as he touched Private's beak leaving goop on it. "Who are you?" He showed off more of his double-jointed skills and as he showed us a magazine said, "The humans know me as Doctor Octavius Brine…" So he's not human I thought. He started to circle us, "Renowned geneticist, cheese enthusiast…and frequent donor to NPR (National Penguin Research) Pledge drives." "But you know me by a different, much older name," he said moving his hands evilly. Dr. Blowhole? Wait no he can't do human disguises…Can he? "A name perhaps you'd hoped you'd never hear again." Hans? No a puffin can't pull off the human disguise either.

He did a ballerina move and stomped his feet dangerously close in front of us causing a retreat. "A phantom!" As we back away he said, "A shadow of a former life." "I…" he said as we stopped at the base of a control panel, "am…" he removed his human disguise and said, "DAVE!" revealing that he was an octopus. "Kowalski?" I said. "Sorry, sir. No clue," Kowalski replied. The octopus removed his wig and repeated his name, "DAVE!" "DAVE!" Kowalski repeated. "Dave!" he said. "Dave?" I asked. "Dave!" "Dave?" Elsa said. "Dave!" "Dave." Private said. The octopus got angry and said, "DAVE!" "Bleh!" Rico replied.

He looked shocked while a cricket chirped. We all looked at the cricket and he stood up, "Sorry." The cricket started walking in a direction, "Wait, wait. Uh, I live this way." He turned and walked the other way out of the room. "Go ahead, Dan. Continue." "You seriously don't remember me?" he asked. I quickly thought of a lie, "Dave! Dave! Right! Oh, yeah, long time! Uh, how's the wife?" Elsa looked at me like I was crazy. Dave punched me with his tentacle and said, "I've never been married! You may not remember me…but I could never forget you." He grabbed a New York snow globe and put in front of us. "Let's shake up some old memories," he said as he shook the snow-globe. Then he went into flashback mode, "New York City. The Central Park Zoo." I hated that place. "Life was good. Roomy tank, great location, monkey house views, and of course my adoring legion of fans!" Another show animal I thought Alex was the only one! "Dave! The octopus of a thousand tricks. I was the total package. And then, you arrived and took everything from me." He's mad at us for the zoo guest choosing adorable penguins over an octopus? "Four adorable baby penguins. With you around noone wanted an old octopus anymore. Out you go, Dave!" This guy got problems.

"And so it went, over and over at zoo after aquarium. Adorable penguins stole the show." That how I feel with that King Julian around. "While I was shunned. Forgotten. Unwanted. Alone." Private looked at the snow globe and said, "That sounds awful!" "Oh it was" he said, "I came to realize, some creatures are born to get all the love. The rest of us get nothing!" Another revenge filled psychopath. "The only thing that has kept me going all these years is my burning thirst for…REVENGE!" That's all? "And my precious souvenir snow globe collection." We turn to his snow globe collection where Rico was swallowing all of them. "Rico way to make a bad situation worst," Elsa replied.

"Ah! What is wrong with you?" Dave shouted as Rico struggled with the last one. "I dunno," he replied before swallowing the last one. I tried to change the subject, "Oh, Daryl, Daryl, Daryl, you can't blame us for what happened to you." "The Past is in the Past," Elsa said. "Uh…Can! That's how this whole revenge thing works!" "oh," Elsa said, "I kind of figured that." He was now holding a tube with strange green goo as he said, "And with this I finally have the power to destroy you!"

Private sum our feelings up in one word, "Crikey!" His octopi minions broke their camouflage and surrounded us. "Nicolas, cage them." Nicolas, Cage them? Really? "I've got some bad new for you, Dennis" I said. "Is your short term memory really that bad," Elsa said. "Ignore her," I said, "You messed with the wrong birds because we are an elite unit the best of the best. The cream of the corn on a platinum cob! And we're gonna take your deadly green goop and sashay right out the exit hatch." "And just how are you going to do that?" Dave asked. "Deploy secret weapon!" We stacked on top of each other and spun around as Rico unleashed a cloud of cheesy goodness. "Ah! The cheese it burns!" So much for cheese enthusiast. We blinded the octopus, "Roll out!" I shouted. We got onto the platform and Rico swallowed the tube with the goop. Dave managed to clear his eyes and growl at us. Private pushed the button and the platform rose to safety. "After them!" Dave shouted.

(End of Chapter Three)


	4. Chapter Four: Venice Chase

Venice, Italy

(Skipper's POV)

We were now standing on the fin of the Sub on the conning tower. "All right, boys," I said. "Excuse me?" Elsa asked. "…And girl, It's just like Cuba!" We jumped off the sub and bounced off an umbrella, "Taxi!" I shouted. We knocked over a gondola and sent three people into the drink. The musician remained on the boat, "How about some music?" I said to the man, "Something chase-y!" I handed him some euros and he began to play a catchy chase song. "Here they come!" Elsa shouted.

The octopi lead by Nicolas spotted us, "Let's move!" I shouted and we started to stroke as the octopi jumped. "Stroke! Stroke! Stroke again! Stroke some more!" Private shouted. The octopi went underwater as we pulled ahead. "Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!" We bumped into another boat and the man in it shouted in Italian. "Sorry!" Private said. While he yelled the octopi where now upside down on a bridge. The octopi jumped onto the man and took over his movement and shut him up. They then controlled him like a puppet and started to row after us.

"We've got baddies, six o' clock!" Private shouted. "Kowalski battle formation!" We stack on top of each other with help from an oar and I held it like a sword. We then started an epic canal oar fight. "Ha!" I said, "So, you squeegees wanna do the gondola mambo?" Nicolas shouted something at me in octopi-nese. "Let's dance!" I replied right before he shot octopus ink at me. "Ah! Mother of pearl, that stings! I've lost visual! Kowalski, Be my eyes!" I said. "Uh…left" I swung left. "Right! Right! Up!" I followed the directions to a tee but the octopi blocked all my moves except a hit you know where. The man shouted in pain as Kowalski said, "Duck!" I ducked and the octopi hit a window. A man opened the window sending the other gondolier into the canal while yelling something in Italian. "I think I got them," I said.

"They are down, sir," Kowalski replied. "Excelente!" I replied unfortunely the octopi formed a slingshot and launched themselves after us. "Skipper!" Private yelled. "They're back up," Kowalski said. "And we are running out of canal!" Elsa added. "Parker Posey! Go all-terrain." As the Octopi flew thru the air we used the oars to get out of the canal. Elsa, Private, Kowalski, and Rico then used them as legs to "walk" on the pavement. Down below we ruined a proposal and got the attention of a mysterious gray wolf. (In Venice?) "What was that?" a tourist asked.

Meanwhile the octopi snuck under us in the sewer. One of them come out of a manhole cover and grab one of the oars. "We've lost engine one!" Elsa shouted. The musician started to play his guitar even harder to match the mood. Another octopus Nicolas maybe grabbed two more "engines" (Rico's and Kowalski's). "And two and three," Kowalski said. We went on one oar for a second before the final oar was grabbed. "Four," Private replied. But luckily the gondola landed on a parked moped and we wheeled away. "Switch to emergency power!" I shouted. "Aye-aye Skipper," Private said before starting the moped. The Octopi using the oars as silts chased after us.

Private steered us around a corner and we speed ahead the octopi in hot pursuit. "Why does this remind me of Monte Carlo?" Elsa said. After a few minutes of speeding along Private spotted some melons and a dead end. "We've got melons! Dead ahead!" he shouted. Rico coughs up a fish and throws it at the back of the melon truck. The ramp open and we drove up, over the melons, and off the roof. We lost the moped as we launched thru the air the octopi right behind us. I managed to get the ink out of my eyes, "I can see!" I said (Didn't melmen say that once?), "Rico, the glowy thing!" Rico reshallowed the tube of deadly green goop before the octopi could get it.

I turned around only for something to get on my face, "Ah! Venetian blinded again!" "That figures," Elsa said. The gondola bounced off two awnings and slid across the ground like a bobsled. The Octopi landed on the gondola in front of us through, "We've been boarded!" Kowalski shouted. "Initiate self-destruct sequence!" I ordered. "We don't have one," Elsa said. "That's an order soldier!" A man on a moped zoomed towards us and crashed sending us, the octopi, and parts of the gondola flying.

We slid away from the wreckage on the little guitar while the musician slid on the surviving gondola seat. "Nice!" I said. "Whee!" Rico said. The people on the street screamed and started running as we slid by. "Frankly, I'm surprised we had a self-destruct sequence," I said. Shortly after I said that we smashed into a wall at the end of an dark and ominous alley. The octopi appeared at the other end trapping us in the alley as they walked closer.

The musician whistled and started playing his guitar, "All right battle stance!" I said. "We're in battle stance, sir," Kowalski replied. Rico took off the object that blinded me and I turned to face our opponents. "Oh! Okay, good," I said, "Now, we, uh, spring our trap." The octopi came closer and smashed the guitar sending the musician running. "I'm not sure they're the ones that are trapped, sir," Kowalski said. Elsa face-palmed as I said, "Kowalski, remember our little talk about true, but unhelpful, comments?" "Yes, sir," Kowalski replied. "Sometimes we just have to wing it," I said.

A snowy owl came out of nowhere and send the lead octopus thru a window (Not what I meant by "wing it" but it will have to do). "Wow," Kowalski said. A seal appeared on top of an ice cream sign and lobed a cylinder at another octopus. The cylinder exploded with a flash and a bang and sent him flying. The final octopus continued towards us but the phonebox in the distance (It wasn't blue by the way) was revealed to be a polar bear with a gun. He fired the gun which was revealed as a military-grade taser eleculoted the last remaining octopus. The octopus fell thru the sewer grate behind us as the owl landed on the bears arm while the seal remained in the sign.

"Sorry for underestimating the plan, Skipper," Kowalski said. "It okay, Kowalski," I said, "Just don't ever doubt me again." I turned back to the newcomers and said, "Now what the heck is going on?" "My thoughts exactly," Elsa replied. Just then an advanced look jet appeared above us and and wolf was lowered on a line to the ground. "Remain clam, Penguins," the wolf said, "You are now under the protection of the North Wind." The Wolf held a badge in front of us and said, "Your welcome."

(End of chapter four)


	5. Chapter Five: The North Wind

North Wind Jet

(Classified's POV)

The Jet left Venice and we speed off towards North Wind HQ. "Oh, my gosh!" Corporal said in his Norwegian accent, "You guys are so cute!" The bear picked up the Penguins in a well bear hug, "You're just so cute!" he said, "And cuddly…yah." "Hey, get away!" one of the penguins said, "No more hugs!" "It's like being licked by a basket full of puppy dogs," he said. Hello a canine is standing right next to him! "Corporal!" I said, "Corporal! Chart a course back to North Wind headquarters." He returned to his work…I knew cute and cuddly penguins would be a distraction.

"Eva, inform them that we're bringing in witnesses," I said. "Private, Dibble me," one of the penguins said grabbing a bag of those disgusting cheese snacks. he jumped onto the control panel and said, "We're not going anywhere with you! We don't even know who the heck you are!" Short Fuse, Eva, and Corporal looked at Skipper like they been insulted while I got into the big North Wind Speech.

"The North Wind is an elite undercover interspe…" I got cut off by the penguin's crunching. "The North Wind is an elite un…" Crunch "An elite undercover interspecies…" Crunch "…task f…" CRUNCH "…force. Dedicate to he…" Crunch. "Helping…" Crunch. "Dedicated to helping…" Crunch. I snarled in annoyance, "Dedicated" Crunch. "Dedicated to helping animals who can't help themselves." "Like penguins," I added.

"Really? And you are?" he said. "My name is classified," I replied. "Classified, eh?" he said, "What is that, uh, Dutch? Can't really hear the accent." "Excuse me?" I asked. "There's the accent," he said. "My name isn't Classified," I said, "My name is classified because I am the leader of this strike team. The Seal is Short Fuse, Weapons and Explosives. The bear is Corporal, he's our muscle. And the owl is Eva, intelligence and analysis."

And for the first time the Penguin seemed impressed, "Well, Agent Classified, we happen to be an elite unit, too," he said. I doubt it. He stepped on the self-destruct button, "Self-destruct sequence activated," the computer said. "You know, you should really label these things," he said. "In three…two…one…" I deactivated self-destruct before the countdown finished. As I pushed the button he grabs my ring finger with his flipper and said, "The name's Skipper. I run this outfit." He pointed at the tallest of the five penguins and said, "Back there is Kowalski he's the brains of our operation. Say something smart, Kowalski." Kowalski was clearly distracted by Eva and just stood there mouth agape. "See?" Skipper said moving on, "He's working on a whole other level."

"And Rico," he said, "He's our demolition expert." The mohawked penguin proved this by pecking at Short fuse's chair, "He destroyed that chair for the sheer fun of it," Skipper replied, "No Reason at all." "Elsa," Skipper said pointing to the only female penguin, "She's my trusted second in command." "I guess you could say I'm the secret weapon," Elsa said. "And then there's Private," Skipper said pointing to the youngest penguin, "He's, uh…He's sort of our, uh, you know…Secretary/mascot." Private looked disappointed at this description. "Helpful for all kinds of diplomatic issues," Elsa added.

"Cute," I said. "And Cuddly," Corporal added. "Oh sorry," Corporal said. "This is going to be a long day," Elsa muttered. "Well, let's see how well cute and cuddly handles this next bit," I said pushing a lever. The Jet then rocketed toward headquarters.

(End of chapter Five)


	6. Chapter Six: Where's the Sound?

North Wind HQ

(Skipper's POV)

The North Wind's Jet flew towards a glacier. At first it appeared at we were going to crash into it but I knew better. The Glacier opened and the Jet entered an entrance tube, "Nice doggy door," I said. Classified frowned at this clearly these North Wind types can't take a joke. The Jet entered the vehicle garage which was filled with other Jets, Tanks, and a giant Exo-suit. "Wow," Private said. "Look at this," Elsa said. Wow," Kowalski said. "Well, well, well," I said, "Not a bad place you got here, Classified." "Thank you," he replied, "That's not my name." The Jet landed on the empty pad, "Arrival Pad Seventeen," a computer voice said.

A few minutes later we found ourselves in a meeting room. "All right, tiny penguins," Classified said, "The best way for the North Wind to protect helpless animals like yourselves is to bring Dr. Brine to justice." While he talked we messed around with the swivel chairs. "Now," he continued, "You were inside his sub…so I need to know everything you know." I sent my Chair as high as it would go (towering over everyone) my teammates followed suit. "Hey!" We all shouted. Down below an angry Classified said, "Just tell me everything you know."

"All right," I said lowering my chair, "Numero uno, never trust a Dutchman in a tulip fight." "Tulip Fight," he replied writing it down. "Canada is secretly training an army of sasquatch." "Sasquatch," he repeated. "Hog dogs are, in fact, only 17% actual dog." Classified stopped turned to me and said, "Not Everything everything! Just everything regarding your abduction by Dr. Octavius Brine." While he said this he wheeled my over to the big touch screen computer on the wall. Well that was a waste of my time, "Ah! Why didn't you say?" I said looking at the screen which was filled with the North Wind's Intel on Dr. Brine. Apparently they thought Brine was a sheep. "What?" Classified said.

I jumped on to the conference table and said, "My team has uncovered that Dr. Octavius Brine is actually an individual known as Derek!" "Dave," Kowalski corrected. "As Dave, the octopus." "An octopus?" Short fuse said, "No, Dr. Brine is not an octopus. He is…" "An Octopus Precisely," Classified said sending the picture of the sheep to the recycle bin, "That's exactly what our Intel indicated." He then brought his watch to his mouth and whispered, "Release the sheep."

He circled a picture of Brine's lab and said, "What you, of course, could not know is that Dr. Brine's laboratory in Venice…" He slid the picture aside and enlarged a picture of the deadly green goop, "is secretly developing a doomsday weapon called the Medusa Serum." "Ah! But what you don't know is that Dirk…" "Dave" "Dave won't be using his Bazooka Serum…" "Medusa Serum" "Medusa serum on anyone" "That part is accurate." "Show him, Rico!" Rico hacked up the Medusa Serum to finally give the goop its name onto the table. Classified stared at it, "You…" he said, "You stole the Medusa Serum?" Were you not paying attention…and they think they're an Elite Unit. "Well, Stole the serum, saved the day, did your job for you." "You don't need to brag," Elsa shouted.

I ignored her as Classified picked up the Serum, "Call it what you will." Then the map behind the North Wind started to get static-y before Dave's Face (or rather his eyes) shows up on screen. "Debbie!" I shouted. "DAVE!" Kowalski and Elsa shouted. "Dave!" "He hacked into our system," Corporal said. Dave laugh but there was no sound then he started to talk as if there was sound. "Where's the sound?" Eva asked. "Dave!" Kowalski shouted, "Your Microphone, it's not on." "I can't hear anything," Eva said.

Dave put on his glasses as Classified said, "Click on the button with the picture of the microphone." "Every time a villain calls in, this happens," Short fuse said. "Hello? Hello?" Dave said as the video cut out. "Now we can hear you, but we cannont see you," Elsa said. "Every time!" Short Fuse said. "It's like talking to my parents," Classified said. "How about now?" Dave asked. We all cheered, "Yes, we've got you." "Excellent," Dave replied, "Now where was I?" He started laughing maniacally reminding us of who he was. "Dave!" Kowalski said. We all resumed our angry faces, "Greetings, North Wind," Dave said, "I see you've met my old zoo-mates." "We were never mates," I replied, "There was no mating."

"Turn yourself in, David," Classified said, "You're powerless now that I've stolen your precious Medusa Serum." Who does this guy think he is, "You? You didn't steal that!" He ignored me and said, "It's over." He doesn't even know how super geniuses work apparently. "It's over?" Dave asked, "Then why did I call you?" Yes why did he call us? "Weird," he said before seeming to remember, "OH! Maybe it was to show you this!" The camera turned revealing a big vat of Medusa Serum. We all gasped at the sight of it, "That is a lot of serum for four penguins," Kowalski said. Dave returned to the frame and said, "Oh, you thought this was just about you four? No! No, no, no. We're just getting started." Dave took out a camera phone and snapped a selfie. He then spun one of his tentacles and said, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go do some shopping…FOR REVENGE!" Shopping for revenge? That wasn't even clever.

He then tried ending the message but got a buzzing sound. His octopi minions rushed to help, "Wait, how do you…?" One of the octopi replied in octopus-nese. "What do I push?" The other octopus replied. "Is it the red,or…" Dave said, "I thought it was the…it not this…" The message finally ended. Then his selfie printed out of the North Wind's printer. Immediately afterward alarms starting going off and the world map reappeared. "Incoming alert!" Eva announced. "Put it on the screen," Classified replied. "The Berlin Zoo. 15 penguins missing." "Dave is kidnapping other penguins!" Private shouted. "No doubt cute and cuddly!" Corporal said. I thought Classified told us Corporal was the muscle? "Hmm! We have to move! What?" Classified and I said in unison.

"Time for our A-game!" Classified said. "Everybody, huddle up!" I said. Classified run to a wall where a computer slid out, "Corporal, Ready the jet." As corporal saluted him he said, "I'm initiating North Wind protocol Zeta!" Corporal hit the North Wind logo on another wall revealing their arsenal. "Twelve more penguins taken from London Zoo," Eva reported. Meanwhile we were huddled up, "This is it," I said, "The mission we've been preparing for our entire lives." "I thought escaping the Zoo was that mission?" Elsa said. "Don't ruin this for me," I replied, "We're gonna take down Dave, or die trying!" "I'll take that action…without the dying part," she muttered. "Kowalski, cancel our improve class!" I said. "Yes, Sir." "Rico, Elsa, Equipify!"

Once everyone left to follow my orders I turn to Private, "Private, do that little thing I like," I said. Private saluted me then stuck his tongue out. "It's still funny," I replied laughing. "Skipper! Good news!" Kowalski said, "I got them to credit our class!" Corporal turn to classified and said, "Sir, the jet is ready." Rico and I went past him on jetpacks with a big gun Private hanging form the handles, "Oh, Yeah, Baby! Just like Super Bowl XIX!" I said. "They're stealing my stuff!" Short fuse shouted. "Really," Elsa said hovering in a jet-pack of her own, "It doesn't have your name on it." Rico found a small missile and swallowed it. "No!" Classified said, "This mission has no place for a pathetic waddle of useless penguins." In my jetpack I turned to classified and said, "Whoa! Who are you calling pathetic?"

Classified put his fist down and shouted, "Enough!" Elsa winced at the word enough as Rico hack up the missile sending it towards the North Wind's jet. The jet blew up sending pieces of it flying all over the place. "See, Rico?" I said, "That's why you can't have nice things." Before I could do anything else I got darted and fell asleep. Private was darted next as he tried to run away. Rico tried to get into battle stance but was darted to. "Kowalski heads up!" Elsa shouted as she was darted. Kowalski was hovering by Eva when he was darted, "You know, I, uh, pretty good with computers myself," he said before he fell asleep. Classified held up his dart gun Rico and Private at his feet and Elsa, Kowalski, and I hovering around him in Jetpacks.

We were striped of our new equipment and put into a shipping box. Corporal gently placed Private in last, "Put on your jimmies, penguin" Short Fuse said. "Oh…" Corporal said. "They are even cute when they're asleep," Eva said. "Not to me!" "I want these butterballs (WE'RE PENGUINS NOT TURKEYS) out of my way, and out of my mission," Classified said, "Ship them to one of our safe-houses. The most remote place on the planet."

(End of chapter Six)


	7. Chapter Seven: I make my own options

Cargo Plane over Africa

(Skipper's POV)

We were in a box labeled "ship to Madagascar" inside of a cargo plane. "Where the heck are we?' I groaned. "Inside a box," Elsa said. "Oxygen content is low," Kowalski said, "I suggest we limit our breathing." At that exact moment Private let out a big one forcing us to send our beaks thru the box. "Sorry! I get gassy when I fly," Private said. "Toot sweet! He does!" I shouted realizing where we were. "We must be on a plane," Kowalski said. The five of us busted out of the box and onto the plane's cold metal floor.

"What did North Wind do to us?" Elsa asked. "Ooh! They gave us badges!" Private said. "Not Badges, tranquilizer darts!" I said. We quickly but careful removed the darts. I clutched mine tightly and said, "Classified! That low-down dirty dog is trying to kick us off the mission." I moved onto a box in front of my men so I could talk to them better. "He thinks we can't save the penguins, because we're just penguins," Kowalski said. "They don't even know us!" Elsa said. "Well Penguins are our flesh and feathers! They're us!" I said, "And if anyone's gonna save us…it's us." "But, Skipper, we've gotta be five miles up," Kowalski said, "That pretty much limits our options."

"I make my own options," I said pushing the door release button. All the cargo and the five of us went flying out the back of the plane into the African desert air. "Brilliant move, Skipper," Kowalski said, "but now we seem to be outside the plane." "Now what?" Elsa said. "I kind of got caught up in the moment!" I replied, "Well, hindsight's 20/20" "good to know," Elsa said. "Okay, Kowalski, your turn to pick up the slack." "Uh…" "Oh!" Private said, "Why don't we catch that plane?" We all screamed as we were sucked right into the path of an oncoming Boeing 787. Inside the cockpit the pilot calmly said, "Bird strike, log it." The plane's windscreen wipers knocked us off the window. "We've got another target, at 12 o' clock," Kowalski replied. "It's only 11:30," Elsa said. "Good," I replied.

"Follow me," I said, "We're going in hot!" We aimed towards the plane below us as Private got on fire, "Hot! Hot! Hot!" he said. "No one likes a show-off Private," I replied. "Aim for first class!" Kowalski shouted. We ripped thru the skin of the aircraft and landing near first class. "Zut alors," a flight attended shouted. "I'm okay!" Private said. "Kowalski," I said from a carry-on locker, "where does this aircraft go?" Kowalski picked up a pastry and said, "From the odd shape of this bagel, I'd say we're headed for Paris." "France?" (Why do we always end up in France?) I said, "Forget it! Not with their Tax laws!" "Then I would suggest a mid-air transfer," Kowalski said. "Affirmative!" We commandeered a snack cart and headed towards the cockpit.

"Peanuts! Peanuts! Peanuts!" Private said, "We're out of peanuts, Skipper!" "Try Pretzels, Private!" I said as we crashed into the cockpit. Thru the cockpit window I spotted a plane with the words "Hong Kong airways" on them. "Bingo" I said, "There's our ride." "Can't stay, doll." I said to the bobblehead, "Danger is my mistress." I got kicked in the face, "Ah! Rico, more height!" Rico grabbed the pilot's face sending the plane higher up. "Pretzels, pretzels, pretzels!" Private said, "We're out of pretzels!" "Then we're leaving just in time," Elsa said. "Yes," I said, "because these folks are gonna freak!" We steered the cart out the side of the aircraft and we used the wing as a launch pad. "Deploy flaps," Kowalski shouted as we clipped the winglet of the plane. Using the sideflaps as wings we glided over to the Hong Kong plane.

"Stay on target," I said. "We're going catch it! We're gonna catch it!" Private shouted. We got within reach of the plane but then the flaps got ripped off by the wind. The cart then went into free-fall, "Crikey! We're not gonna catch it!" Private shouted. "Wait a minute," Kowalski said, "Where's Skipper?" "Oh no Dave caught up with us," Elsa said. Just then Rico pointed to where I actually was, "Time to get creative. Start grabbing boxes!" "Going long!" Private shouted when Rico threw him. Private "landed" in a box labeled parachutes. "Oh, Private," I said, "stop playing with those backpacks. Find something useful!" The box was then ripped from under Private as Rico finds a box with an inflatable inside. "Now we're talking," I said as Kowalski, Elsa, and I landed on it, "Let's get to work!" We hooked up to the air hole and started to blow up the inflatable, "300 meters!" Kowalski shouted. "Speak American, Kowalski!" I shouted as I hate the metric system. "Sorry, sir," he replied, "218 yards!"

"109 yards," Kowalski added. A minutes later the inflatable and the rest of the packages landed safety on the desert sand. We landed on the bouncehouse, jumped, and landed in battle stance on the sand. (Expect for Private who landed face first but he quickly got on his feet). I let out a sigh of relief and said, "Okay, then it's clear what we need to do next."

One hour later…

"Whee!" Private shouted. "Whoo-hoo!" I said. We were all cheering as we bounced in the inflatable. "That feels right!" Kowalski exclaimed. "Yes!" Elsa added. We all exited the bouncy and returned to the desert sand. "Impressive bouncing, boys." "Not all of us are boys," Elsa said, "I thought we went over this." I completely ignored that comment and continued, "Now, then, back to civilization if we're gonna take Dexter down we need to know where he's gonna strike next."

Rio De Janeiro, Brazil

(Classified's POV)

We arrived at the Rio Zoo in the jet scanning the area from the sky. "Penguin footprints, still warm," Eva reported, "We just missed Dave." "Blast it! He's gone!" I said with a growl. "So many penguins!" Corporal said, "Ahhh!" He grabbed a section of the control panel and ripped it out. He then took the section and started to chew it. "Boss!" Short Fuse shouted, "He's stress-eating again!" "Corporal!" I calmly said. "There, There!" Eva said trying to comfort the bear.

"Rub the angry out of the tummy," Short Fuse added. "Corporal! Focus!" I said. He stopped chewing and focused on me. "We are going to save those helpless penguins," I said, "Because we are the North Wind and no one…no one breaks the Wind." I saluted him and he said, "No one breaks the Wind." "There's a good Corporal," I said as he took out the panel section of his mouth. "Now, We rescued those four penguins already didn't we?" I asked, "Shipped them off, all cozy and snug, to a Madagascar safe…"

Just then an alarm started to sound in the cockpit, "How come there's beeping?" I asked. I quickly turn to the control panel while Eva typed away, "Sir, those penguins," Eva said, "they never made it to Madagascar." Corporal starting chewing the panel section again to cover up his screams. "What?" I asked, "Well, where the dickens are they?"

(End of chapter seven)


	8. Chapter Eight: Dublin, Ireland?

Dublin, Ireland?

(Skipper's POV)

We lifted the manhole cover and looked at our surroundings…it was nice and a little humid. Rico coughed up some sand from the desert another reason I hate deserts. "Kowalski, what are our coordinates?" I asked. "From my calculations," he said, "we've arrived in the center of Dublin, Ireland." "I expected Dublin to be less Shanghai-ish," Elsa said. "We must be in the China-town section," Private said. "All right, soldiers," I said, "we gotta blend in. Riverdance!"

We Riverdanced to a small street stand and then went into hiding. We hid among the Irish dolls and looked around, "But no time to kiss the Blarney Stone," I said, "We need to find Intel on Dave's location. Pronto!" Across the street I spotted an octopus hiding in a fish market, "A-ha!" I shouted. I went across the street and starting slapping him around, "All right, you! Where's Dave? Give us the goods!" I said, "Spit it out! Don't make me use shillelagh!" My men caught up with me. "Um, Skipper," Elsa said, "That's a baby squid." The Baby squid started to cry and I quickly put him down, "Sorry, laddie," I said as I slid him back into the ice.

"Ugh," I said the baby squid giggling in the background, "Stranded on the Emerald Isle without a single clue. Well, so much for the luck o' the Irish." "Skipper, look!" Kowalski said pointing to a Television. "Huh?" The report spoke in a language I didn't understand and strange symbols filled the screen. "Begorrah!" I shouted, "Does anyone speak Gaelic?" "No," Elsa said, "and I don't think that's Gaelic." "No, but it looks like Dave's been busy," Kowalski said, "He's stolen penguins from Guadalajara!" "Madrid!" Private added. "Paris!" I said. "Athens," Elsa added. "Bangalore," I said. Rico started hacking up snow-globes as Elsa, Kowalski, Private, and I listed off cities. "Dusseldorf!" "Olso!" "Arendelle!" "Osaka!" "Corona!" "Stockholme" "Rio de Janeiro!" "Nairobi!" "Amsterdam!" "Baton Rouge!" I quickly noticed all the Snow-globes, "Dave's Snow-Globe Collection," I said.

"It's every zoo and aquarium he got kicked out of!" Kowalski said."Don't tell me where he has been," I said, "Tell me where he will have has been next." "Not proper English," Elsa muttered. Rico started gagging again, "Wait, what is it, Rico?" I asked, "It's a book! It's a film! It's a play!" "First word," I said, "Two syllables. Sounds like…gah" "Hugah," I said, "What starts with hugah?" Rico finally hacked up the final snow-globe, "Shanghai," I said. "Dave hasn't been there yet, Skipper," Kowalski said, "If we hurry, we can still stop him." "We need to leave now," Elsa said. "Nice work, Rico!" I said. "Pack your bagpipes; it's time to blow this potato stand!"

We got ourselves into a cardboard box put stamps on it and got loaded into a mail-van. The van left Dublin tires screeching and moments later we arrived at our destination. "So, this is it," I said, "Shanghai's famous Little Dublin district." "Skipper, look!" Private said standing on his toes. "I see you, Private," I said, "Who's the big boy standing on his tippy-toes?" "Wha? No, I mean…" "I just wanna eat you up!" "Skipper!" Elsa shouted, "Penguins disappearing! Dave!" "Oh…right," I said.

"Skipper, look!" Kowalski said, "Above Private!" I looked up and saw a poster, "Dave's next target," he said, "Shanghai's famous Mermaid Penguins."Good eye, Kowalski," I said, "and once again…you've proved that you are a meaningful and valued member of this team."

(End of chapter eight)


	9. Chapter Nine: Aquarium Battle

Shaighai Marine World

(Skipper's POV)

"Ladies and gentlemen," an announcer…well announced, "Shanghai Marine World is pleased to present…our world famous Mermaid Penguins! Tonight our mermaids dedicate their performance to all of the missing penguins around the world. Stay safe, little guys, wherever you are. And we hope you come home real soon." Dave entered the room fish bucket in hand from the Creeps of the Deep exhibit.

We were disguised as children's backpacks, "Now," I said, "Keep those eyes roving." "He could be anywhere," Elsa said. "Yes," I replied, "he is a master of disguise. He could be a small child, a house plant." I turn to Private and said, "Maybe even you, or me! Is it you Kowalski!" "Hey, hold on," a young boy said standing by Rico. He reached inside him and took out a time bomb. "Huh?" he asked as it ticked. He quickly put it back and stole a bag of cheesy dibbles! "Wait a minute," I said holding a pair of bincolars seeing a tentacle coming out of a man. "Bingo! Nice try, Dave," I said, "Operation Flash, Splash, and Crash is a go!" "Splendid!" Kowalski exclaimed. "Whoo-hoo!" Rico said. "Take positions," I said. We broke cover and got into position. "Penguin feeding time will begin in two minutes," the announcer said.

Kowalski used a fishing rod to get on top of a whale skeleton while Rico used Star-fish as climbing apparatus to stay on the tank wall. As Dave got closer to the Mermaid Penguin tank Private, Elsa and I were hiding in a gift cart. I imitated static and spoke into my walkie, "Target, 30 yards and closing." "In position, Skipper," Kowalski replied. "Rico, report," I said. "In position," he mumbled from inside a custodian closet. "And for you, Private." "Yes, Skipper!" "Here's your mermaid costume," I said. "What?" he asked. "We need a diversion," Elsa said readying her tranquilizer gun.

"And, frankly, you're the only one who can pull off that look," I said. "But I can do more, Skipper," Private said, "I want to help the team really help the team!" "If you think I'm ready, which I am! Assuming you agree, and perhaps even if you don't" Private said. "You are helping us," Elsa said trying to sound reassuring. "I like the moxie, soldier…" I replied, "But right now, I need a tail on that tush and the cutest smile you've got. You trust me, soldier?" "Aye-aye, Skipper," he replied. "Hey, it's feeding time!" someone in the audience said. "Target, 10 yards from flashpoint," I said.

"Private, you're up," I said. Private emerged in costume, "You just mermaid my day," I said. "Mmm" "Flash is a go!" I said throwing Private into the audience. "Look! They let one of the mermaids out of the tank!" "Oh, she is so cute!" "It's the cutest thing I've ever seen!" "Shields up!" I shouted. The audience got out their smart phones and cameras and started snapping pictures the camera lights flashing. Dave gets blinded by the amount of light getting into firing range. "Target is stunned," I said as Elsa aimed the tranquilizer (just in case), "Rico, bring the Splash."

In the closet Rico said, "Yeah, yeah!" preparing a vacuum as a launcher. He turned the vacuum's reverse button and rode a plunger to the wall of the leopard seal tank. Rico mocked the seal and they backed up to break the glass. The seals, Rico, and a ton of water were blasted at Dave hurling them all to the next room. The seal with Rico reach a balcony, The Seals fell off into a petting pool below but Rico stayed on our floor. Kowalski used the skeleton of a saw fish to saw off the support of the whale skeleton.

Meanwhile an aquarium employee found Private, "Oh, what are you doing out here, cutie? Come on, back in your tank." The worker tossed Private into the mermaid tank as the rest of us focused on Dave. The North Wind arrived to crash our party, "Secure the mermaids," Classified said, "and find me…" The North Wind found themselves face-to-face with Dave, "David, the octopus." Kowalski finished sawing and our trap was sprung, "a little late, North Wind," he said. We arranged ourselves on the whale's spine, "Mission accomplished," I replied as Classified growled at us. (what did you expect from a wolf?) "High one!" I said as we did our trademark celebratory move.

"Corporal, take our prisoner the one who belongs to us, into custody," Classified said. At that moment Dave dumped his disguise causing it to fall to the floor in a heap. "What?" he said. "You melted him," Short Fuse naively said, "You birds are sick!" We quickly pushed aside Dave's disguise. "He's going in through the pipes!" Kowalski said. "That low down dirty snake," Elsa said. The four of us rushed to the main tank where Dave was already draining the water. We serpentined around the people and saw Private among the mermaids. "Skipper!" Private shouted. "Private? Private!" I said, "You gotta get out of there!" Dave's tentacles grabbed the mermaid penguins and pulled them down the drain. "No, no, no! No, no, no! Private!" I shouted.

"Skipper," Private yelled as Dave grabbed him. "Private!" I shouted as he got pulled down the drain followed by all the water in the tank. "Help!" "No!" I shouted. Elsa, Rico, and Kowalski carried a leopard seal over and smashed the tank wall. "Here we go!" Elsa shouted. "Move, Move, move!" I shouted as we went down the drain leaving a bunch of confused people and The North Wind behind.

(End of Chapter Nine)


	10. Chapter Ten: Who says penguins can't fly

Shaighai harbor

(Skipper's POV)

We exited the pipes at the harbor where the North Wind's plane was waiting. "Private!" I shouted, "He's got Private!" Dave put Private in a cage with the mermaid penguins and entered the sub. "He's getting away! He's getting away!" Elsa and I shouted. Kowalski turns my head and said, "Skipper! The North Wind's plane!" "Sweet chariot of the gods!" Elsa exclaimed. "Can you fly it, man?" I asked. "There is only one way to find out…"

Nineteen minutes later…

Kowalski flipped several pages of the manual Elsa and Rico at his side. "No…I, uh I still can't read," he said. I took the book and threw it, "Then we're going off book," I said. "That went well that one time," Elsa said. Rico and I started typing random keys on the keyboards. Rico swallowed some coins and I "fired" him at some switches and the clutch. The engines fired off behind us as the North Wind appeared, "No! NO, no, no!" Classified shouted.

Rico pulled another lever and the jet launched into the air…too high though. "Too much, too much, too much!" I said pushing the lever back down. That leveled the jet for a second then it fell out of the sky barrel-rolling on the way down. "Why can't we ever make just a normal landing?" Elsa said. "Ahhh!" "Whoa!" Classified shouted. The jet landed upside down on top of the North Wind. "I'm getting the hang of this, Skipper," Kowalski after pushing buttons on a side panel. "Good!" I shouted, "We're coming for you, Private!"

The Jet launched again and we flew upside down towards Dave's sub. "Those ludicrous butterballs are letting David escape!" No we were going after Dave to save Private. "Eva, secure transport," he said. Eva complied and flew off, "Short Fuse, Corporal, hitch us a ride!" Short Fuse readied a big gun and jumped on top of it into Corporal's paws. The big gun became a bigger gun and Short Fuse served as the sniper. He looked thru the scope the jet in the sights, "Fire!" he shouted. A magnetic clamp fired and clamped onto the jet and starting pulling corporal along.

"Go, fetch!" Corporal yelled throwing a disc like object Classified running on all fours after it. Eva with her jet pack found a boat and brought it next to the dock. Classified jumped caught the disc and it expanded into a zip line that attached to the rope. "Hold her steady!" Classifed shouted as the disc climbed the rope. We meanwhile reached a cave and did a proper barrel roll giving the North Wind a real ride.

"Sir, Dave is pulling ahead. We are too heavy," Kowalski said. "Ah!" I said, "Curse our heavily cheese-dibbled diet!" "I don't think that's the issue," Elsa said. "Right," I replied, "Rico give me a West Helsinki fire sale! Everything must go!" The back door opened and Rico started throwing stuff out the back. Of course everything Rico threw out hit Agent Classified sending him back down the rope. "That's everything sir," Kowalski said. "Have you purged the chemical toilet?" I asked. "But Rico was in there for 15 minutes!" he replied. "Just do it," I said. "It's not like theirs anyone down there anyway," Elsa said. Kowalski complied and the contents of the chemical toilet ended up in Classified's face. We reached a rock formation but unfortunately the rope attached to us got tided up stopping the jet dead in its tracks. "NO! No, no, no!" Classified shouted.

We could only watch helplessly as Dave's sub submerged into the ocean. "Self-destruct sequence in five…" "No!" Elsa shouted. "Private!" I said, "Stay strong, soldier!" "Four…" the countdown continued, "three…two…one…" The cockpit opened and we fell out the exploding jet falling after us. The North Wind bailed out of the boat and when the jet hit the water it exploded.

2 Days later…

Somewhere on the Pacific Ocean

The four of us were stranded in the middle of the ocean on a wok. "Skipper's log," I said, "Private has been kidnapped by Dave…while we have been cast adrift for what seems like days. No rations, fresh water…(cough) or land in sight. Kowalski's sick as a dog and Rico keeps trying to eat him." "Just, please, just cut it out!" "There's no reason for that detail to be in the log!" Elsa shouted. "Not sure how long we can hold on. This may be my final entry." Just then I get hit by a cork from a bottle and we finally noticed the North Wind's raft. The North Wind was enjoying a feast on their raft, "2004, Grand Cru. Hints of pear, white peaches," Classified said I prefer a root beer myself but… "This salmon is delicious," Eva said. "Oh, I've never been more hydrated in my life," Short Fuse said.

Eva turned to Classified and said, "Let me cut you a piece of the salmon." "No, thank you," Classified said. "It's the most delicious thing on the boat," Eva replied she just had to rub it in. "I have to loosen my utility belt," Classified said. "No, I'm full. Just dump it in the ocean," Short Fuse said. Yeah just feed the sharks not the starving penguins next door. "You know, we're all in the same boat, here," I said. "Actually, we're not," Classified said. "He didn't literally mean the same boat," Elsa said, "he was speaking metaphorically." "Okay then, we're not in the same boat literally or metaphorically," Classified said, "And perhaps you could express a little more concern over the fact that you stole and destroyed a $19 million vehicle!"

Private is in danger and all Classified cares about is the North Wind's toys? "Bill me," I said. Just then the sonar started to get a reading, "Corporal? Corporal!" Classified said. "We're picking up a signal, sir," Corporal said turning to a computer display, "It's five klicks southwest but it stopped at that remote island." Remote Island? "Land?" I said, "Good on you! You've tracked down some land." Short Fuse was now on top of the North Wind's raft, "No, silly willy," he said, "We've been tracking your little secretary/mascot." "What?" I asked, "You put a homing device on Private?" "All of you, actually when I darted you." Classified said. "What!" Elsa said. "Let me handle this," I whispered walking up the raft towards Classified. "You low down dirty, mangy, filthy, flea-bitten, bum-sniffing toilet drinker!" I shouted.

"I could have handled that," Elsa said. "Not with your icy temper," Kowalski said. "Excuse me?" she said giving Kowalski an icy stare. "But…" I said, "Good!" "See," Classified said grabbing a piece of bread, "I told you. You should've left this to the professionals." He took a bite of the bread getting the crumbs all over me…maybe he's right.

(End of chapter ten)


	11. Chapter Eleven: I made a Monster

Dave's Sub

(Private's POV)

The octopi pushed the cage past several stacks of cages filled with penguins. "892…893…894…," a Penguin doing push-ups said. Another penguin was getting a tattoo in another cage while others just looked out defeated. "Ahoy, there!" Dave said. Then in a sing-songy voice, "Penguins!" as he ascended on top of his death ray.

"I bet you're all just dying to know why I brought you here," Dave said. Um not really…Skipper where are you. "He's gonna kill us all!" one of the mermaid penguins said. "What?" he said, "no. ugh. My Medusa Serum doesn't kill anyone what's the fun in that?" Well at least he's not going to kill us. "So, um," I said in a fake voice, "what does it do?" "Something much, much worse," he said with a hiss. "Right!" I said, "but, like, what specifically?" "Well," he said, "That's exactly what I came up here to show you." I don't like the sound of that.

"All I need is a test subject," he said, "Hello, little buggy-boo!" The cricket from back in Venice was in a jar, "Is this about the chirping? Because I could…whoa!" "Behold, as I unleash the full power of the Medusa Serum!" Dave shouted, "fire!" The ray fired and turned the cricket into a horrible monster. "Yes! It works!" Dave said, "I made a monster! I made a monster!" after dancing around some he said, "And all you adorable penguins are next!" "Crikey!" I shouted blowing my cover. I can heard Skipper now…Private you blew your own cover! Get out of there!

"Huh? Who said that?" he asked as if he didn't already know. He opened the cage and started checking the mermaids. "NO." he picked up the rest, "No. No" he picked up me and ripped off my disguise. "Yes!" he said, "Gentlemen, you remember Private." "Hey, Private," the octopi and the mutant cricket said. "You'll never get away with this, Dave," I said, "My brothers and sister are coming. And, together we'll take a wrecking ball to your whole rotten operation." "Call off the hunt, everyone," Dave said, "Turns out the elite unit will be coming to us. Boop." Please hurry Skipper.

(End of Chapter Eleven)


	12. Chapter Twelve: Plan Off

Dave's island

(Skipper's POV)

Eva had bincolars trained on Dave's base, "Eva," Classified said, "What do you see." "My count is 30 hostiles," Eva replied into her headset. "31," Kowalski said, "Uh, those two are very close…together. I mean, intertwined. Physically. But not in a…" "lx-nay on the irt-flay, Kowalski," I said.

"Poor Private," I said, "Alone! Helpless in the belly of that beast." "But We're an elite unit remember," Elsa said. "We've faced some long odds before Skipper," Kowalski said, "but these look like the longest. And oddest. If we're going to pull this off, we'll need a diversion." Diversion? Dave has our diversion. "Deactivating jungle camouflage," a computer voice said. "Shh. Will you be quiet?" Classified said. Excuse me we are the masters of quiet. "Listen, Classified…" I said. The hologram camouflage went back up, "Short Fuse, you were supposed to handcuff them to the raft!"

"I can hear everything they're saying…" Elsa said, "This is awkward." "Don't you hologram me!" I said taking their camouflage down. "I tried," Short Fuse said, "But they don't have hands. They just have flippers boss. And I have flippers, so it's flipping useless!" Ah the advantages of being a bird. "All right, pooch. If you won't work with us…you better work for us!" "That doesn't make any sense," Elsa whispered to Kowalski. "Our plan requires a diversion." "I give the orders around here," Classified said. "OF your team," Elsa said, "not our team." Classified ignored that technicality and said, "As much as it pains me, I need you to act as our diversion for our operation. Understood?"

How many times do we have to tell them we're an elite unit? "No! This is our plan." "Tell him off Skipper!" Elsa said. "And it requires you to cause a diversion," I said. "Dye-version." "Di-version." He can't even say diversion right. "Dye" "Di" "Are they seriously arguing about this," Elsa said. "The English language is a hotly debated subject," Kowalski replied. "Dye!" "Di!" "Dye!" "Di!" Dye!" "Di!" "Gentlemen, there is only one way to resolve this." "We should kiss," Kowalski said. "Plan-off" Eva replied. "Yup, Plan off. That's what I was gonna say," he replied, "Plan off." "Smooth Kowalski…real smooth," Elsa said.

I drew in the dirt a picture of Dave's sub, "Here's Dave's sub," I said. Elsa handed me a small rock and I said, "And this young, helpless, vulnerable rock is Private." "And here's Dave," I said. Kowalski and Rico pulled out a pineapple with a face on it. "While you four blowhards," I continued, "Divert the octopi…We strike fast, and strike hard!" That method worked on Leopard Seals, the Fossa, a Ship's crew, a mad animal control headhunter, a rabid dog, and the wilds of Madagascar so I don't see why it won't work on Dave. Kowalski, Rico and Elsa cheered, "Get on in here!" The four of us started slapping the model Dave with our flippers using trademark Penguin moves.

"Slap him silly, Rico! Come on!" I said. "This is for Private!" Elsa shouted. "Kowalski, free the hostages!" I said. Corporal came out of nowhere and smashed the Pineapple, "Now, that's what I'm talking about, big fella!" I said. Corporal smiled but it disappeared with a look from Classified. "With Private freshly liberated," I said, "we celebrate with a well-earned high one…and feast off Dave's sweet remains." "Well at least we're not killing him then eating his liver," Elsa muttered. "Any Questions," I asked struggling not to laugh at that old joke.

We then high oned…a lot. Rico high oned me in the behind, "Whoa! Hey,now!" "Rico…" Elsa said. Classified then clapped mockily and said, "Wow. I mean, truly impressive. Especially the bit where you slap the fruit." He then got serious and said, "Corporal, dim the lights. Short Fuse, Glasses." The Seal passed out four extra pairs of special glasses. "Ohh…" Rico said. Classified coolly flipped his North Wind badge to the ground. A round thing lifted from the badge and the badge folded into a square which then projected a holographic dome around us…a dome filled with images.

And also their was dramatic music playing…The North Wind's theme I guess. "My apologies. I had to rush a bit. The schematic is a little crude." "You call this crude," Elsa said. "Where is that music coming from?" I asked. "Wow!" Kowalski said. "All right," Classified said, "At 21:50, Skipper, Kowalski, Elsa, and Richard was it? Divert the octopi away from their posts." They do have the better plan. "At 22:00, Short Fuse breaches the hull…with a swarm of self-guided underwater nano-charges." What was that Kowalski about the bad guys always getting the good stuff? Rico and Kowalski were both gasping while Elsa didn't know if she should be gasping too or supporting the penguin plan. "I call them Wet Ka-booms!" Don't say Ka-boom around Rico. "Please don't," Classified said finally something we can agree on.

"Okay, sorry," He said. "At 22:02, Knock-knock." "Who's there?" Corporal asked. "The North Wind." "The North Wind who?" "The North Wind who doesn't have time for knock-knock jokes…" Classified said, "Because we're too busy taking down Dave!" Images swirled around me Classified's words blending together. "Personal Hover tank? Check. Auto-targeting wing mounts? Why Not?" Why did we use most of our gambling money on a circus instead of an Airbus-A280? Why did I spend the rest of that money on golden teeth? Why did the Chimps give all that money from Rome away? I blame Monoco Animal Control! "At 22:09..." A holographic explosion knocked me from my trance. Holographic Penguin ran down the dock in front of holographic Classified with Dave in one hand and Private on his shoulder Dave's sub exploding in the background. "Mission accomplished." And then to rub it in he said, "See that? I don't even look back." He walked with his hologram and continued, "There's a huge explosion and I just keep walking." He turned off the hologram with a wave of his hand and the briefing ended.

"Whoo!" Short Fuse shouted, "Way to go, boss! That's North Wind, Sucker!" "Nicely done," Corporal said. Kowalski hit Rico softy on the side. "Blah-di-blah-blah-blah." I said, "A good plan is about more than effect-y stuff…" "Effect-y stuff?" Elsa said. "Let me finish Elsa," I said, "and vocabulary words." "Oh, and you certainly know a good plan," Classified said, "Your operation in Shanghai allowed Dave to escape…with your boy." "I've never lost a member of my team. It must feel…awful." "You have no idea," Elsa said. "Imagine the guilt. The regret. The feeling that, I don't know…that it should have been you." Blast it. That is what I'm feeling right now. I looked down at our plan and saw a tiny version of private staring back at me.

"All for penguin plan," Eva said. Kowalski, Rico, and Elsa raised their flippers…loyal to me til the end. "All for North Wind plan," She said. Classified, Corporal, Short fuse, and herself raised their hands. I raised my flipper as well shocking my team even Classified looked a bit shocked. "His…his is better," I said. "Wha…What?" Elsa said. "Bleh?" "What?" "I'm sorry," I said with great regret, "But I can't lead you this time." "But…" Kowalski said. "We're the Elitist of the elite remember," Elsa said. Kowalski continued, "We're a team. And you're our skipper, Skipper. We don't need these guys." "No, Kowalski, but Private does." "I think," I said, "this time, we leave it to the professionals." "But, Sir…" "It's settled," I said, "We take our orders from Agent Classified now."

Rico was stammering trying to say something. "That's an order, Rico!" Elsa slowly saluted me with tears in her eyes, "You will always be our fearless leader Skipper," she whispered. "All right, classified what's the diversion." 

Shortly…

We appeared in front of all the octopi with an accordion and dressed in German outfits. "We take this shame to our graves," I said. "Agreed," Elsa and Kowalski said. I started to play a catchy polka song Elsa provided a guitar in addition to my accordion. We quickly got all the octopi's attention with our funny dance. The Song finished and we all said, "Hey!" We starting playing it again and the octopi followed us away from the sub Elsa and I in the lead all of us humming. We lead them up the stair and the North Wind came out of hiding.

"Time?" "22:00 hours," Eva replied. "Time to take down Dave," Classified said. And everything went according to plan the nanocharges blasting the doors off the sub. They then ran thru the sub blasting, melting, and cutting their way thru walls and doors taking out Octopi as they went along until they reached Dave's control room. Dave was facing the other direction in his chair (star-wars style) when Classified said, "David, the octopus…show me your tentacles." Dave turned around all but one of his tentacles in the air, "All of them," Classified said gesturing with his hands. He held up his last tentacle which was holding a box of clam juice which he started drinking.

But just when it seemed they were finally going to get their man hidden Octopi came down from the ceiling and captured them. Meanwhile the other octopi realized that they been had and separated to find us. We came down from the treetops with help from the accordion. "We lost them, Skipper," Elsa said. "Not a moment too soon," I said, "These hosen are ridin' up my bundesliga." "All right," I said, "grab your coconuts and hold them tight." We grabbed some coconuts and used them as earmuffs… well three of us. "Classified should be walking away from a huge explosion," I said, "with Private on his shoulder in three, two…"

"Give him a welcome home, Rico!" I said. Rico fired off some fireworks and we started to celebrate the return of Private. "Yes! In your face, Dave!" Kowalski said. "Private is back!" Elsa said. "Welcome home, Private!" I said. Our celebration was short-lived however as we realized something was very wrong. "Yeah, All right!" Kowalski said, "Here we go. All right. Sir, the sub didn't explode…and, uh, I fear the fireworks may have been a tactical mistake." Nicolas appeared behind us and a sea of Octopi came from above and started to beat us up. Dave's sub unscathed submerged taking us with it.

(End of Chapter Twelve)


	13. The monsters are due in manhattan

Dave's Sub

(Skipper's POV)

The octopi mocked us by humming the Polka song as they knocked the four of us in a cage. We failed Private and we failed all of penguin-kind. I bet our friends back at the circus didn't even notice our absence. We turn to the voice of Short Fuse, "Stay Calm!" The Octopi pushed a big cart past with the North Wind in cages and Corporal in handcuffs. "Do not panic!" Short Fuse said in a panicky voice, "We will still win! Be full of love! Don't hate! Follow your dreams. Love yourself. Love other people. Pick and choose your battles in life! Don't let anyone tell you what to do. Ignore the Haters." For some reason a certain song by Taylor swift popped up in my head(yes that song). "Love the one your with," Short Fuse finished. "Eva!" Kowalski shouted.

Eva turned her head in his direction but remained silent. "I know," Kowalski replied reaching out for her. The Octopi pushed us onto the platform and pushed the down button. The platform lowered to Dave's inner sanction where he was waiting. "Welcome, Skipper, Kowalski, Elsa, and rootin'-tootin' Rico!" He said, "The gang's all here! The mood is electric!" Do your worst Dave. "Is this really, finally everybody?" he asked. He faced the cage at a raised slanted table and started to walk away, "All right, Dave, just what have you done with…" Dave turned the slanted table around revealing Private strapped to it. "Private!" Kowalski, Elsa and I said. "Oh, guys!" he said. He than turned to Dave and said, "You're in for it now, Dave!"

"Really? Anyway great catching up" he asked before using a remote to position his ray over Private, "Now, who's ready to move on to live penguin testing?" "You point that death ray away from Private right now!" I shouted Elsa preparing to use her secret weapon. "It's not a death ray, Skipper," Private said, "he's gonna to turn us into monsters." "Monsters?" Elsa said. "Yepper-doo," Dave said, "And what comes next Dave? Invasion! Horrible mutant penguins, unleashed on the streets of New York City!" "You're the monster!" Kowalski shouted. "Yes!" Dave said getting uncomfortably close to the cage, "I'm the monster. Everyone made that clear to me every day of my entire life. but let's see how much everyone loves you when you're the monster."

"Skipper!" "You can't take away Private's cuteness!" I said. "He's the cute one," Elsa said. "That's his thing!" Kowalski said. "What?" "It's all the little guy's got!" I shouted. Private rolled his eyes and sighed. "Hmm. You are super cute," Dave said, "We better crank this up. Drew, Barry, more power." Two of his minions complied and cranked it up to it's highest setting. "Ready?" he said. "Negotiations have broken down!" Kowalski shouted. "Rico, the paperclip! Bust us out of here!" I shouted, "Chop-chop soldier!" He hacked up a baseball glove and started hacking up the contents of his stomach but no paperclip. The entire time Dave mocked us by inching his tentacle slowly to the fire button. "Enough!" I shouted, "Where's the Paperclip!" "PRIVATE!" Elsa shouted. Private instantly started to gagged but right when it look like the paperclip would appear and break him out Dave pushed the button. The Beam fired and was followed by a blinding light.

"No!" I said as the light filled our vision. Dave chuckled at his genius then gasped when he saw the result. "Private," I said staring at the burnt spot where Private used to be. "Oh no," Elsa said. "I disintegrated him," Dave said, "that wasn't supposed to happen." "You maniac! you blow him up" Kowalski exclaimed. "no," I said. "Oh, Well!" Dave said, "This is why we test things, people! I'll have to lower the power for the others." The octopi wheeled the cage out of the room as we mourned Private's death. We failed Private and we failed all of Penguin-kind. "Full speed ahead, gentlemen," Dave said, "The Monsters are due in manhattan."

(Private's POV)

As soon as Dave left the room I sneaked out from under the table paperclip in hand. I threw the clip away and started to move from the table when I spotting some octopi by the control panel. I quickly left the area before they could see me and entered the hallwall. I knocked out an octopus, "Sorry!" I said as I snuck down the hallway. Farther down the hall a door opened behind me and I quietly looked into a room filled with octopi. A big screen was in the room and the North Wind was being shown. "Crikey!" I whispered and quickly went to find them.

(Classified's POV)

"All right, all right, Octopus," I said, "Whatever Dave's paying you, I'll double it." I octopi didn't replied and starting pushing buttons. "Is that a yes? Does anyone speak octopus?" "Sorry." "Not a clue." "blast it!" I said. "You free us…" I said as the thing we were tied too started to move, "we give you…many fishes." I started making munching sounds to no avail as the "car" spun around and started moving forward. Lights turned on revealing a amusement park ride of doom. "What is that?" I asked as we inched ever closer. As we watched a series of painful looking machines turned on saws and steel jaws of death. "Oh! NO!" Short fuse said as he saw a chair that was next to a gun that shot fire, medieval weapons, and a bomb.

"Oh, great," I said. "Oh, no! This is it!" Short fuse shouted as the ride accelerated. "I don't want to die all squishy!" We all screamed as we headed towards the jaws of death. "We're dead. Dead!" I said unaware that we were now going backward. "Dead. Dead! Oh, now we're dead!" I shouted, "Dead! Dead!" "I pushed a button," Private said. "Super," Corporal said, "Well done, Private!" The ropes were released. "good work, malinki," Eva said. "Yes. Yes," I said taking my paw off corporal, "Um, excellent button pushing. Hmm. Compliment, praise, etcetera." Private dropped the bat he was holding as I turned to the team, "All right agents…we are back in business." We left the area while Private started to go the other way, "Wait!" he said, "Skipper, Elsa, Kowalski, Rico…all those penguins They're this way!"

"So is a massive army of octopi," I replied, "And as soon as we return to the North Wind Headquarters…grab fresh equipment…and work up a smashing new plan…we'll come speeding back, and take down Dave." "But the penguins are in Danger! We have to go now!" "Again, Huge army of octopi," I said Short Fuse spreading his flippers as visual. "So, because you failed once," Private said, "you're just running away?" "We did not fail," I said, "And we are not running away. We're just very sensibly regrouping." "Skipper wouldn't care!" Private replied, "Plan or no, fancy equipment or no…he'd never leave a man behind!"

"Well, I suppose we can't all be penguins, can we?" I asked. We turn to leave but Private had one last thing to say, "No. but maybe you should be." Private then turned and headed in the direction of his fellow Penguins. The closed behind him leaving us to our thoughts, "Come on," I said. We turned around and left the room the door closing behind us. Maybe the cute and cuddly penguins have something to teach us after all.

(End of Chapter Thirteen)


	14. Attack of the Mutant Penguins

(Skipper's POV)

The Octopi threw us in a large circle filled with the rest of Penguin-kind. Dave himself ascended on the platform getting into his human disguise. "Showtime, everyone!" Dave shouted, "Big smiles for the Big Apple!" I jumped and grabbed the platform with my flippers, "Listen up Doris." "Skipper what are you doing," Elsa whispered. "You turn us into freaks, and then what?" I asked, "you think that's gonna make everyone love you?" "No," he said putting on his glasses, "but they'll despise you."

He knocked off the platform with his Tentacles sending me to the floor below. "Ahhh!" Kowalski and Rico slid into position to serve as a living landing pad. "And I'm sure going to love that!" he said as the platform ascended out of view. Where is The North Wind when you need it the most?

News broadcast…New York City.

"Breaking News! The Missing penguins have been found!" (crowd cheers) "Okay, According to my notes… genetic researcher, Dr. Octavius Brine has found the penguins and is bringing them here to New York's Battery Park." (More cheering) "The Penguins are coming Back! Oh, my gosh! Look!" (Camera pans to New York Bay)…

(Dave's POV)

The Sub speed towards the city with me on top of it giving the illusion that I was emerging from the bay. The citizens cheered and chanted penguins as the sub got closer. The sub stopped and raised out of the water as I pointed upward. Once the sub was at it's full height the "Tentacle" propellers slammed down on the pavement stabilizing the sub. I perform a acrobatic spin and landed on the deck. One of my minions threw me a mic from inside the sub and I spoke into it.

"Penguin lovers of the World! Guess who I found" I announced pausing to let the public cheer. "Penguins! Penguins!" the crowd shouted. "It wasn't easy…" I said, "but seeing the penguins get what they deserve will make it all worthwhile." "what a weird thing to say," a reporter said, "I'm so excited!" I changed the setting of the microphone and said, "Do it." One of my minions started pushing button on the Ray controls and got it into firing position.

Meanwhile…(Private's POV)

I ran to a window overlooking all the penguins who were waiting to be mutated. I instantly spotted the guys and started shouting, "Skipper! Skipper! Skipper! Rico! Elsa! Kowalski!" (Skipper's POV) "It's like I can still hear his little voice calling to us!" I said. "We're finished aren't we," Elsa said. "I wish that wasn't the truth but yes," I said, "We're finished." (Private's POV) "You have to get out of there! Move!" (Skipper's POV) "You have a great otter there! Moo!" "Why would he moo?" Elsa asked. "What are you asking me for? I'm not Private's little ghost." The gun pulsed with energy above us, "uh, oh," Rico replied. A yellow/green octopus pushed the fire button and the ray fired. I heard Private's ghost say, "Nooo!" before a bright light took away everything we were.

(Dave's POV)

"Are you ready?" I asked. "Yeah!" the crowd replied as a ramp appeared. I rolled down the side of the sub and slid down the ramp into the awaiting crowd. I pointed back at the sub and said, "Your new and improved Penguins!" The bay of the sub opened and to the crowd it looked like a mouth was opened and a thick green smoke hid the penguins mutations as they descended. "Penguins! Penguins!" the crowd cheered.

Yes it worked! The crowd continued to cheer as the smoke cleared revealing the mutated penguins. The crowd stopped cheering and looked in shocked confusion at the penguins, "Wha…" a man said. "Aw, the people love you," I said the scared crowd around me, "Just go give them a hug!" The penguins opened their mutated flippers and ran towards the crowd. That was when the pandemonium started the people climbing over each other to escape.

"Don't let them touch you!" After a few minutes I was on a pole with some other frightened people, "Oh, no. What's happening?" I said, "Nobody likes you anymore? Well, the fun and games are just beginning. Watch this, penguins! Someone call the Exterminators!" " ** _Exterminate!"_** a Dalek shouted…Just kidding. The NYC pest control showed up after Battery Park was devoid of human life.

The pest control truck had giant vacuums on the front and instead of the usual dead cockroach in the logo a dead penguin was on the side. One of the trucks was missed but I quickly fixed that with a spray can and a stencil. "And when the exterminators take you away you never come back!" I threw a random penguin into the truck from the open top. I knocked on the side of the truck and all of the trucks started revving their engines. An exterminator with a riot mask on blew a whistle and the trucks drove towards the penguins. Exterminators riding on the sides of the trucks used wire nooses on any penguin not in the path of the vacuum tube.

(Private's POV)

I ran to the open doors to see what was happening. I look out over the park, "Oh,dear." I said, "Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!" The park was filled with mutant penguins being chased by NYC pest control being rounded up. "What do I do? What do I do?" I asked. The doors closed, "Crikey!" I shouted. I turn around to see three octopi slowly approaching me.

"Come on, then, you wanna go?" I asked, "You want some argy-bargy?" I then starting running towards them octopi had their eyes open wide preparing themselves for impact. I veered off at the last second and disappeared down an aisle of cages. The octopi veered off as well and looked around in confusion for me. They all turned when the ray started speeding towards them me at the controls. "Woo-hoo-hoo!" I shouted as they jumped out of the way. The ray burst thru the doors and landed on the ground I spun it until it crashed behind some trees.

"Uh-oh, missed one!" Dave shouted throwing a penguin towards an exterminator truck. He jumped and started walking away, "What a wonderful day in the park!" Let's see about that Dave. I emerged from my hiding spot and began looking for Skipper or anyone I recognized. "Skipper!" I shouted spotting him at a gift cart. "Bleh!" he said. A cat ran past and Skipper ran after it. "Wait!" I shouted. I used a truck to get to where Skipper was. "Hold on! What are you doing?" I asked as Skipper disappeared into a News van. "Skipper!"

"Huh?" he asked a cat in his mouth. "Don't eat that!" I shouted as Skipper ate the cat. "Skipper, listen! It's me, Private!" I said getting rid of my monster disguise. "I've got a plan, but I need your help. I need my Skipper." Skipper looked at me for a few minutes as if he was remembering something. Then his eyes returned to normal and he said, "Private?" "Yes!" I replied, "That's it!" "Private, you're alive!" he said as he hugged me. He laughed until he started coughing and throw up the cat. "Oh!" I said.

We found Kowalski with snake-like flippers and a big head on a garbage can. "Kowalski!" Skipper said, "You've got to get a grip!" Kowalski hissed and got closer. "Kowalski," I said, "Eva is worried about you." "She is?" he said dropping the can, "What did she say?" Kowalski got real close to me, "Did she say my name, specifically? I mean, were there tears?" He picked me up and shook me, "Details! Come on, tell me!"

Then something clicked, "Private! You're alive!" he said as he hugged me, "This feels a little awkward…but I'm happy." We found Elsa by a park bench unlike the rest of the penguins she was ice blue and her flippers looked like they were made of ice spikes. "Elsa!" I shouted. "Private?" she asked, "You're alive!" a trail of ice followed her as she approached us. "Now let's find Rico," Skipper said.

We found him at a Kabobs kart eating the product. "Rico! You need to listen to us," Skipper said. He burps fire out of his beak, "I guess you're kind of the same either way," Skipper said. "Private," Rico said as he flew towards us. While Rico hugged me a Exterminator truck approached, "Heads up!" Skipper shouted. We escaped but a one-eyed penguin wasn't so lucky. We watched from atop an umbrella, "Looks like we're back in business, boys," Skipper said, "And our business is saving penguin-kind." "We are back!" Elsa replied.

"Who's with me?" he asked. "You know I am," Elsa said. "Count me in," Kowalski added. "Let's do this!" "Yeah!" we all exclaim. We got into our trademark battle stance, "Let's create and feel momentum!" Kowalski said, "Sir, how long do we stand here like this?" "Until we've reached maximum coolness." A few seconds after that he said, "there it is." "Now all we need is a plan," Elsa said. "I've got one," I said. "Uh…huh?" Skipper said.

(End of chapter Fourteen)


	15. Chapter Fifteen: battle for Penguin-kind

Battery Park, NYC

(Skipper's POV)

"You stole Dave's ray?" I asked. "Well, I figured if we could reverse the ray…," Private said, "we could turn everyone back to normal." Private threw the remote to Rico and climbed the ray. "Reverse the ray?" I asked. "that's brilliant!" Elsa said. "But it's impossible," Kowalski said, "In order to reverse the ray, we would need to replace the Medusa Serum…with a power source of almost immeasurable cuteness."

"Immeasurable cuteness?" Elsa said. "Where the heck are we supposed to get that?" I asked. Private hopped into the power chamber and hooked the power lines to himself. "Oh…" Elsa said. "No, wait, Private! No!" I said, "We don't know what that will do to you! Ah!" Rico dropped the Remote and the fire button hit a rivet. The ray fired and turn a mutant penguin back to normal. "All right!" he said. "The ray! It works! It works!" Kowalski said. "Private!" I said, "Are you okay?" "Yes!" he replied as a hand sprouted out of his butt. "Gasp!" "Whoa! Butt-hand!" Kowalski said, "there's a hand attached to his butt. That was not there before."

"Get out of there!" I said, "That's an order!" "Permission to defy order," Private said. "Permission denied!" "Than I deny your denial." "He our only chance!" Elsa shouted. "It's too risky, Private!" I shouted, "It already made you sprout a butt-hand!" "I know it has to be me this time," Private said, "and I think you know it too." I stepped as his hand replaced the power line and he was placed in the center, "I'm the secret weapon!" he said.

I pushed the control on the remote and saluted him. Private saluted back with his butt-hand. Meanwhile back in the park Dave was still in his human disguise, "I'm happy! And Yet…" he said, "Now that I have my revenge, I feel empty." Well what did you expect. "As if what I needed all along was…" He said, "More Revenge!" Of course a bad guy would need more revenge. "In fact, Robin, Write this down," He said, "Tomorrow, we move on to Kittens! Then, Puppies! Bunnies! Pandas!" His list of revenges was got off when he saw the ray raising over the trees.

"Charlize, They're on the ray!" he shouted. He ran towards us and then got rid of his disguise. "Helen, hunt them down! William, hurt them. Halle, bury them! Hugh, Jack, man the battle stations! Kevin, bake on! We're still gonna need that victory cake!"We stopped the ray and I looked towards the sub where an army of octopi were emerging. Nicolas spotted us and the octopi wave approached while Dave approached from behind. "We're only gonna get one shot at this," I said, "How we doing on those snow globes?" "Beam-splitter ready!" Kowalski said. "Fire at will," Elsa said as Rico flew them both down by me. "Do it, Skipper!" Private said.

I got my flipper ready to push the button causing Dave and the Octopi to stop. "Ah!" Dave said. "Uh-uh!" All the octopi said. I pushed the button and nothing happened…I pushed it again...I pushed it several times. "Dead batteries?" I said. Elsa face palmed. "Game over, Skipper." "Aha," Dave said. "No!" Private said before spotting a nearby store, "Rico, Batteries! Skipper! Kowalski! Elsa hold off those octopi! We're doing this now!" "You heard Private! Deploy!" Rico flew off to the store while I flipped Kowalski over and wrapped his long flippers around him. Elsa and I charged while Kowalski spun towards the enemy. Kowalski knocked out some octopi with his spinning while Elsa and I went fin to Tentacle.

Meanwhile at the store "I can dream about you" played on the radio as Rico entered. He found the batteries but got distracted by the Cheezy dibbles. "Get back, you aquatic Savages!" Kowalski said. "How are their this many," Elsa said. "Behind you! Beside You! Six o'clock Twelve o'clock!" Private shouted as we fought off the octopi. "Hmm…" Rico said as he decided between "Organic" Cheezy Dibbles and Original Cheezy Dibbles. "They're coming from every direction!" Private said.

"No kidding," Elsa replied. "There's just too many of them!" Kowalski shouted. In the distance we heard an ice cream truck approaching. An Ice cream truck driven by…The North Wind! The octopi held up their tentacles to surrender as the North Wind knocked them out with the truck. They drove up the ramp and bailed out the back. The truck exploded when it got inside the the Sub exploded but the North Wind kept on walking. Corporal and Classified fistbump as the walk in slow-motion towards us. "Whoa!" Kowalski said.

"You came back," Private said. Classified saluted Private and he saluted back with his butt-hand. I still can't get over that thing. Just then a Exterminator truck rolled past the vacuumed them all up(How is that possible!) and drove away. An Octopi jumped out right before it crashed into a statue and fell over. "Oh!" Short Fuse said, "That's why you look back at the explosion."

Well there goes the element of surprise. Meanwhile Dave jumped onto a merry go round and launched himself into the air. "I can dream about you!" the radio sang as Rico hummed along. Then he saw Dave flying towards the ray. "Bleh!" he yelled as he ran towards us dibbles flying everywhere. Back on the ray we were in retreat, "Fallback Positions!" I shouted as we knocked octopi off left and right. "Stay away from Private!" I said as Elsa and I kept the Octopi at bay. Kowalski knocked every octopi off as they get close to him. He had just got his flipped wrapped around one Octopus when Dave landed behind him and grabbed him.

"Suck it up Kowalski!" he said. Dave threw Kowalski and the octopus towards a oncoming exterminator truck but Kowalski managed to clog the hole. Well until the octopus hit him in the face sucking them both in. "No!" Private shouted. "It's over Skipper," Dave said. "we'll see about that," Elsa said. "Over? That's weird." I said, "Then why is Rico throwing me a fresh pair of double-As?" Rico flew up and launched the batteries at me. I caught them but putting them in allowed Dave to catch up to me. Before I could press the button Dave knocked it out of my hands. "No!" I shouted as I jumped after it, "The Remote!" Dave grabbed me, Elsa and Rico before we could get the remote and he threw us towards the exterminator truck.

Dave turned his attention to Private as he broke the glass on top of his ray. "Ah!" he shouted as it started to crack. "Rico!" I shouted, "Dibble me!" Rico tossed me a bag of Cheezy Dibbles as he and Elsa was sucked in the truck. I grabbed the bag and hit it on the side opening it just a little. One dibble exploded out of the bag and rocketed towards the button. Then everything seemed to slow as I was suck inside the truck. Meanwhile at the ray Dave was laughing maniacally as he dropped towards Private. Private would have none of that, "Hi-yah!" Private said as he punched Dave with his butt-hand.

In slow motion Dave was knocked out of the chamber and landed on the snow-globes. Dave and his minions on the ground could only watch as the Dibble reached the remote. The Dibble hit the fire button then with Dave on top of it the ray fired. The beams hit all the trucks then exploded out in a blinding blast of bright cuteness that you could probably see for a 100 mile radius.

(End of Chapter Fifteen)


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Private!

Battery Park, NYC

(Skipper's POV)

The trucks shook and a ton of non-mutated penguins stream out. Several Penguins hopped out in front of us, "It worked!" I said, "Private!" The four of us ran towards the ray clearing a path thru the penguins. "Excuse me! Emergency! Coming through!" I shouted, "Make a hole! Make a hole!" "Help!" Private said. "Oh, no! Don't worry, Uh…" Kowalski said as Private mutated, "A chrysalis is just forming around you. That's perfectly normal." The chrysalis sealed around Private and everything went quiet.

We looked in shock at the chrysalis. The silence was broken by Corporal breaking the glass. He grabbed the Chrysalis and placed it in front of us The North Wind surrounding us. "Private," I said. "He sacrificed himself for us," Elsa said. Rico whimpered in sadness while Kowalski remained quiet. Just then the Chrysalis began to hatch and we all watched in amazement. "huh?" "what?"

The chrysalis cracked and then it exploded sending liquid everywhere. "Ew!" I said. "Ugh!" Classified replied. "that was a bit gross," Elsa said. "Private?" I asked. Private sat up and chuckled as antlers sprouted from his head, "Oh, look at that. Majestic!" Kowalski said. "Hello!" Private said. We all cheered and came in for an embrace. "Oh! Hey!" Kowalski said as one of the antlers came by. "What's Wrong?" Private asked. "Look out for the…" Elsa said, "whoa." "Have I got something…?" Private asked. "Cover your eyes. Don't turn your head!" I said.

"Just a…" I said. "Is there a thing?" Private said, "So…How do I look?" I open my mouth to answer but Kowalski bet me too it, "You're hideously disfigured…and will probably be hunted for sport." "Kowalski," Elsa said. "What?" I punched Kowalski in the side, "What?" he asked. "if there's anything we've learned from this delightful adventure, Kowalski," I said as I got closer to Private, "It's that looks don't matter it's what you do that counts. And look at what you did." Private looked around and saw Elsa, Kowalski, and Rico smiling back at him. He looked around and saw one of the Mermaid penguins with a mate and a baby penguin. He saw another couple with a lot of babies(that quickly?) "Yes, sir," I said, "You are the most meaningful and valued member of this team." Private saluted me and I saluted back(I don't miss the butt-hand by the way) Elsa, Kowalski, and Rico saluted as well. I held my salute and sticked my tongue out and Private did the same.

"Way to go, Private!" a male penguin shouted. "Atta boy!" a Female penguin announced. The four of us lifted Private up and began his victory lap. "Nicely done," Corporal said. The Penguin crowd cheered every single one for Private. "Way to go, Private. You did it!" The North Wind made hearts with their hands. "We're so proud of you!" "You saved us!" "We love you, Private!" every Penguin in the crowd made hearts of their own with their flippers. "Yeah, we love you!" "You the penguin!"

But then a loud rumbling filled the air and the ground began to shake. We dropped Private and got into defensive positions, The North Wind looked on in shock, the cricket had his mouth wide open, and the other penguins began to cower in fear. By the Empire State Building giant tentacles grabbed the buildings and a cute version of Dave appeared over it. "Ramirez!" I said. "Dave" Elsa and Kowalski said. "Dave!" he laughed evilly and started coming towards us but then he hit the glass.

From inside one of the Snow globes he shouted, "What? Are you kidding me?" The snow globe fell and landed in my flippers, "Dave! Oh, Look at you." "You think this is over? I'm just getting started!" "What do we do with him now?" Kowalski said. Elsa looked at the globe and said, "I suggest we…" "Aw!" a young girl said. 'Open this right now!" Dave shouted. "Here you go, kid," I said handing the globe over. "Whoa!" Dave said as the girl gasps, "Cool!" she said.

She touched her finger on the glass of the globe and Dave mirror her with his tentacle. He smiled, "I hope you find Happiness, Dave," Skipper said. "Now that is what I call a happy ending," Elsa said. "It snowing! It's snowing! It's snowing!" she shouted shaking the snow globe, "It's snowing! It's snowing! It's snowing! It's snowing!" "She reminds me of someone," Elsa said. "Who," I asked. "My sister Anna," Elsa replied. "Oh…her," I said, "whatever happened to her." "I don't know," Elsa said, "I had hoped to see her here." "Elsa?" a female penguin said. We all turned with a shocked expression. "Anna?" Elsa said. "Yes," she replied.

The two long-separated Sisters went to each other and embraced, "Anna…I'm never losing you again," Elsa said. "Now that's a happy ending," I said. "Right. Now, then…" Classified said, "Uh, um… This is difficult for me to say…" "Is it osteoporosis? You just gotta lean into the vowel. Os-tee-oh-…" "No, no," he replied, "I want to say, you four…er…five are the bravest agents I have ever known." We looked up at the North Wind in appreciation. "The point is…" Classified said, "I was wrong about you. And I hope there is some way I can make it right." "Give us jetpacks?" Kowalski asked. "We should kiss," Eva said.

Kowalski you sly dog. "Whoa. Uh…" he said, "Did you just say…?" Eva grabbed Kowalski and kissed him her wing covering their faces. Private gasps while Rico gags and I cover Private's eyes. "Well, that feels right!" Kowalski said. "Kowalski you are one smooth operator," Elsa said. "I think I'd actually prefer a jetpack, please," Private said. "Finally," Elsa said pausing, "Make that six." "Ooh, I think we should go with Private's and Elsa's idea." Despite Short Fuse's dismay at the idea Classified considered it, "Hmm?"

(End of Chapter Sixteen)


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Jet Packs and Rays

Over the New York Bay

(Skipper's POV)

The Five of us plus Elsa's sister rocketed across the bay. "Celebrate" was playing as we flew around. We all laughed, "Yes!" I said. "This is fun!" Anna shouted. "Welcome to the team," I announced. "Kowalski, what's our trajectory?" I asked. "95% certain this will end in massive flaming disaster." "And the other 5%?" I asked. "who cares!"Elsa said. "Irrelevant, sir. Jetpacks are awesome!" "Agreed"

"Yeah!" Rico shouted. "Whoa!" I said. We rocketed towards liberty island and flew circles around lady liberty. we laughed into the sky and rocketed towards the horizon. "Who says penguins can't fly!" Private shouted. "Happy day!" I shouted as we rocketed into the air. "Um, Skipper, We are going to turn me back to normal, right?" "Absolutely. First thing, Monday."

Thursday afternoon…

"Whee! I'm in a rocket ship!" Mort announced from the power chamber. "I want to push the button," Julian said. "Give me that" Kowalski said taking the remote. "Stealer!" "He is so annoying," Elsa replied. "Why is that?" Anna asked. "You don't want to know," I said. "Let's do this! I'm ready!" "Okay, on three. One, three, go!" Kowalski smacked him, "Ow!" Kowalski continued to smack Julian's hand away. "I'm just going to do a little practice push…ow." "Okay, I'm not going to press it…Why are you smacking my hand? Hey, look over there!"

The five of us looked where Julian was pointing as he pushed the button. "I'm a laser show!" Mort shouted as the ray fired. "Julien!" Elsa shouted. "Ah. Oh!" Private said he as fell to the ground, "Hey!" he shouted. "That's the Private we know and love. High one!" I replied. "What's a high one?" Anna said. Private and I high oned giving Anna her answer. We all gave each other high ones while laughing. "Immeasurable cuteness, right there," Kowalski said. "good to be back," Private said.

"I feel like a French fry," Mort said as he fell out of the power chamber still attached to the power lines, "Whoa! I'm okay!" "And with cuteness to spare," Elsa said. "Come on! Frosty mugs of herring juice, all around." We walked out, "Private's buying," I said. "What?" "You know, If I'm being honest, I expected a little more…Pizzazz!" Julian got his pizzazz in the form of Mort eating him. "Yes! Now, that's pizzazz!" Julian said. Mort giggled.

(Fade to black)

(Celebrate plays)

Cast

Skipper- Tom McGrath

Elsa- Idina Menzel

Kowalski- Chris Miller

Private- Christopher Knights

Rico- Conrad Vernon

Dave- John Malkovich

Agent Classified- Benedict Cumberbatch

Short Fuse- Ken Jeong

Eva- Annet Mahemoru

Corporal- Peter Stormare

Anna- Kristen Bell

Mort- Andy Richter

King Julien- Danny Jacobs

Additional Voices

Cricket- Sean Charmazt

Security System voice-Jeff Fischer

Documentary Filmmaker-Werner Herzog

Penguin Prisoner-Steve Apostolina

Pilot/aquarium employee-stephen Kearin

Penguin fan- Al Roorigo

Mermaid Penguin- Kelly cooney

Aquarium Announcer- Steve Alterman

Antarctic Penguins-Susan Fitzer, Chris Sanders, Conrad Vernon, Emily Morowind, Mike Mitchell, Hope Levy, Walt Dohrn.

Boy at Aquarium- Carter Hastings

Woman at Aquarium- Hope Levy

Girl at Zoo- Ava Acres

Boy at Zoo- Cullen McCarthy

Flight Attendant- Nicholas Guest

Angry man- Adriano Aragon

Computer voice- Lymmanne Zager

Gondolier- Jim Pirri

New York Reporter- Billy Eichner

Shanghai Tv Reporter- Elizabeth Pan

Girl with Snow Globe- Angie Wu

The End


	18. Epilogue: extra stuff

Cheezy Dibble Ad

(Epic Music)

DreamWorks logo

Skipper: Being an expet in international espionage mean have the best of the world's finest edible delicacy, Cheezy Dibbles.

(Bag of Cheezy dibbles appears)

(Bag flips over)

Skipper: Crafted from real cheesy byproducts…

(Zooms into ingredients)

Ingredients: Onlythecheez-

iestcheezethatevercheezedwith-

thecrunchiestdibblesonearth

Skipper(continued): …and flavoring…

(return to front of bag)

(Bag explodes)

(Video of skipper eating cheezy dibbles)

Skipper: They're meaty, sophisticated…

(Loud Crunching)

Skipper: Orange.

Skipper: Cheezy Dibbles. Dibble Me!

(#dibbleme appears on screen)

Skipper: Also available in Atomic

Elsa: Who on earth would buy that flavor?

Skipper: Elsa you're ruining the Ad!

Elsa: Sorry…

(Video Rico releashing cheezy dibble dust onto Dave's and his octopi minions' faces)

Dave: Ah! The Cheese, It burns!

Offical sounding guy: Cheezy Dibbles Inc is not responsible for any injures inflicted by the consumption of our products. Also do not releash powdered dibble's into anothers eyes. NO Octopi were harmed in the making of this film. Cheezy Dibbles, Atomic Dibbles, and all other products all other trademarks are the property of Cheezy Dibbles Inc.

(Fades to black)

Guide to becoming an elite agent

A lot of static…

Skipper's voice: Congratulations, By viewing this video, you have entered the classroom to become an agent for the most elite group in the world.

Private: The North Wind?

Skipper: No, not the North Wind. Us.

Elsa: I kind of figured that.

Skipper: Penguins. We are the most elite group in the world.

"We strike Fast, and Strike hard!"

"Hi-yah!"

"Sir, we're approaching our target."

Private: But North Wind has a great logo.

Kowalski: I gotta go with Private on this, sir. They do have a great logo

Skipper: Okay, they have a great logo

Elsa: Don't forget their HQ

Private: it was a great headquarters

"Nice doggy door."

Private: And great gadgets

Skipper: Look, I'll admit the North Wind can be impressive.

Short Fuse: Whoo! That's North Wind, Sucker!

Elsa: wha…what is he doing here?

Skipper: But there's more to being an elite agent then having a bunch of cool toys.

Skipper: Now here's what it takes to become an elite agent.

Elsa: this is going to be great.

Skipper: First off, you need a keen eye for observation.

On screen text: Keen Eye

Private: Those glasses always give me a headache.

Elsa: Private, let's stay focused here.

Skipper: We're helping these people become elite agents, and to become one, you need to be able to assume false identities.

On screen text: false identity

Skipper: Blend in seamlessly no matter the surroundings or situation.

"Where'd Private go?"

Kowalski: Private was brilliant that day, I could not tell him apart from the Cheezy Dibbles.

Skipper: It's that kind of commitment to detail that sets us apart.

Skipper: Being an elite agent also requires the ability to make split-second decisions.

Text: Split Second Decisions

"I still can't read."

"Then we're going off book."

"Oh, look! A button."

"Huh? Private,don't!"

Skipper: The crème de lat crème of the elite agents master a very particular set of skills.

"I'm getting the hang of this, Skipper."

Skipper(and text): Lock Picking

[Video of Rico picking lock]

Skipper(and text): Parkour

[Video of Rico on fish tank]

Skipper(and Text): Martial Arts

[Video of Penguins in battle stance]

Skipper: And an appreciation for Bavarian folk music.

[Video of Penguins dancing to Bavarian folk music]

Private: How come I didn't get to dance?

Elsa: Um you did.

Kowalski: Remember our Video?  
"I just want to celebrate"

Private: I forgot about that.

[Video of Private falling off control panel]

(Rico gagging)

"Wait, what is it Rico?"

"It's a book! It's a film! It's a play!"

"First Word." Gags

Skipper: Since an elite agent may need to travel to exotic locales, A mastery of language is essential

Text: Mastery of language

"Sounds like…(gags) What starts with(Gags)?"

Skipper: We, Elite agents, are the best of the best. We need a keen sense of deduction

Text: Deduction

"All right, you! Give us the goods!"

"Sir, that's a baby squid."

(crying)

"Sorry, laddie."

Text and Skipper: Intelligence

"Tell me everything you know!"

"Never trust a Dutchman in a tulip fight."

"Tulip fight."

"Canada is secretly training an army of sasquatch."

"Sasquatch"  
"Hot dogs are, in fact, only 17% actual dog."

"Not everything everything!"

Skipper: And moxie.

Text: Moxie

"I respect a soldier with some moxie"

"Really? Then I really think we should…"

"Whoa, Whoa! Dial back the moxie, sass-mouth!"

Skipper: And perhaps, no trait is of greater importance than possessing a memory like a steel trap.

Text: Steel Trap Memory

"Who are you?"

"I…Am…Dave!"

"Debbie! Dave!"

"Dave."

"Dirk. Dave."

"Dave."

"Go ahead, Dan. Continue."

[Dave punches Skipper]

Skipper: But if you do make the grade, you will join the greatest organization in the world. And that's always a reason to celebrate.

"Whoa! Hey, Now!"

Kowalski: Sir, in many ways, we are the original band of feathers.

Private: And we have the best job.

Elsa: Take that North Wind!

Skipper: If you use the vernacular of the day, we're the Bomb.

Skipper: Rico, I said "the bomb." Not "a bomb."

[Rico laughing]

Skipper: Class dismissed. Run for it, boys!

Explosion

(fade to black)

Madagascar Mash up

Kowalski: Once, there were four penguins.

"Skipper, we appear to be flightless."

"Well, what's the point of these?"  
Kowalski: Then a fifth member joined the team.

"Hello! are you my family."

"Huh?"

Kowalski: Together, they've become an elite group of international thrill-seeking, mission-completing…Hey!...flapper-shaking… "Whoa! Hey now!"…Uh, heroes. "And here's the Intel to prove it…

Skipper: Struts

Kowalski: check.

Skipper: flaps

Kowalski: check

Skipper: engine, coffeemaker

Kowalski: check. Check.

Skipper: Step on it!  
[video of the penguins stepping on it]

Kowalski(referring to nuclear reactor): Don't even ask me about the uranium-238 blanket!

Skipper: Okay.

[Video of the Nuclear reactor turning on]

Skipper: Kowalski, Progress report.

Skipper: Progress report.

Skipper: Status report.

Kowalski: The gear assembly is badly damaged, sir. It's only a matter of time before…

[Video of super plane crashing]

Skipper: You didn't see anything.

Skipper: We're gonna face extreme peril. Private probably won't survive.

Private: Come and get it.

Skipper: Let's roll.

Skipper: Analysis.

Kowalski: It looks like a small incandescent bulb, designed to indicate something out of the ordinary, like a malfunction

Skipper: Manual. Problemo solved.

[Video of penguins high-oneing]

Skipper: How about some music?

[video of penguins watching over circus]

[video of rico making sushi]

Skipper: Navigation

Kowalski shrugs.

[Video of penguin operating train]

Private(in Antarctica): Well this sucks.

Dave: Boop!

[video of penguins waving]

[video of private dancing]

[video of Penguin high-oneing]

Kowalski: I'm really getting tired of this song.

Alex: We are so sorry.

Skipper: Well, apology accepted.

(Bavarian folk music plays)

Private: I like this song

Kowalski: It never gets old

Skipper: My goodness, doll, you're shaking like a leaf.

Gloria: You must have some money leftover.

Skipper: I used it to buy teeth and then have them capped in gold. Now I can eat apples. Sadly, I discovered I don't like apples.

[Video of truck slamming into Private]

Skipper: Looks impressive, Kowalski. But will it fly?

Kowalski: Yes. If we fold it here, here, and here.

Throws paper airplane

Skipper: Nice

Skipper: Gear down

Skipper: Gently now, you just wanna kiss the ground. Just a little peck, a smooch, like you are kissing your sister.

Gear rips off

Skipper: Chimichanga! These pillows are filled with baby birds!

Kowalski: Skipper, we're slightly behind schedule.

Skipper: How slightly?

Kowalski: Six to nine years.

Skipper: Sixty-nine years!

Skipper: We'll be back from our gambling spree in a couple of weeks.

Alex, Marty, Melmen, Gloria: Bye

Skipper: Or whenever the gold runs out.

Marty: Bye-bye.

Melmen: Bye

Skipper: Just kidding. We're never coming back!

Skipper: Initiate warp drive.

Warp drive initiates

Plane flies away.

(fade to black)


	19. this is not the end

**Here are the stories in order ...**

 **Part One**

The New Adventures

Operation: Arendelle(Special)

Operation: Dalek part one

Operation: Dalek part two

Prehistoric Invasion(Special)

The Return of the Red Squirrel

Frozen ½ the revenge of the southern isles

The Battle of Madagascar(special)

Earth's Darkest Day part one: The Secrets of Africa

Earth's Darkest Day part two: Collison Course

Conclusion

Elsa and the Riders of Berk (prelude to The DreamWorks War)

The DreamWorks War

 **Part Two**

A Very Penguin October part one

Terror of the Daleks(Special)

The Return of The Destroyer of Worlds

Revenge of The Nanites

Jiggles Returns

Revenge of the Graveyard Eight

Ghost in the Tardis

The Second Dreamworks War

The Battles of Berk

The Siege of Far Far Away

Monsters Vs Daleks

Danger at the bottom of the World

Battle in Metro City

The Final Battle

A Very Penguin October part two

The Nightmare (revenge of Pitch Black)

The Battle before Halloween

Operation: Sub Zero(Special)

Operation: Cold Turkey (special)

Villainmageddon

Part One: Blowhole and Company

Part Two: Attack of The Daleks

Part Three: The Glorious End

Conclusion

Return of the Puffin: Part One

Return of the Puffin: Part Two

Bonus

Penguins of Madagascar: alternate version

 **Part Three**

A Very Penguin December

Gift of the Daleks

Cyber-men in the Snow

City of the Penguins

Revenge of the polar bears

Day of the emperor penguin

The Second Treasure of the golden Squirrel

Rise of the Phoneix

Return of Dr. Blowhole

Daleks in Russia

return of the octopus

The Frozen Earth

Twelve Days of Daleks

D-day

Wrath of the Daleks

Battle in Seattle

Battle on the moon

Fall of Skaro

The Fall of Dalek-Sec

Battle for Chicago

Dalek offensive (one shot)

War across time and space part one

The Oncoming storm(War across time and space part two)

Return of the Timelords(War across time and space part three)

Christmas Special: The Time of The Daleks

Conclusion

Penguin New Year (one shot)

 **Part Four**

The Newer Adventures(to be updated)

War of the Daleks part one: The planet of war(Special)

War of the Daleks part two: Operation Free Earth (Special)

The Ultimate Adventure

The Cyber-invasion

Tales of Arendelle

The Pirates of Arendelle

Frozen: The musical

The Dalek Invasion of Arendelle

The Surprise (one shot)

 **Part Five**

Penguin Days of Summer part one

Kingdom Come Again

Wrath of Egypt

Yet Another Revenge of Dr. Blowhole

Here comes the Daleks

Revenge of Nanite-Daleks

The Return of the Amarillo Kid(one-shot)

Across the multiverse

Another Earth

Afro Circus Penguins

The Return to the Prime Universe

Into the Medusa Cascade(special)

Penguin Days of Summer part two

Back to The Base

Lost in Prehistoric Times

Night of the Reptiles

The Red Squirrel Strikes Back

Conclusion

Compromised!

 **Part Six**

The Third Dreamworks War

The Return of Drago

Monsters Vs Daleks rematch

Revenge of The Fossa

Battle of the Jade palace

The Battle of New York

The Wrath of Dr. Blowhole

The Fall

Victory of the Puffin

The Three Betrayals

The defeat

The Return(coming soon)

Skipper: Escape from Denmark(One-shot)

Kowalski: Attack of Dave(One-shot)

Private: Escape from Hoboken(one-shot)

Rico: The great Xscape(one-shot)

Operation: fighting back

Conclusion

The Day of The Penguins(Special)


End file.
